AlwaYs & foReVEr

2010-03-23T21:10:00.003+08:00

should she be sad?

LOL. i managed to do somethg to make myself proud. I TRY NOT TO CARE:D and i didnt care as much.

tts all because harmoc is the love and harmoc pple are e love<3 we are just a lovely bunch and i love hanging out with them. i hope we get our room soon and LETS GO CHILL THERE EVERY BREAK! we shud so totally hang out tgt!:D

mummy is startg a full time job tmr. which means i will be really sad + lonely at home in future. meaning lesser home-cooked food): meaning MAYBE i can slim down since i detest food other than home cooked food so much. LOL

2010-02-22T22:18:00.002+08:00

really hate myself now. stupid. supposed to finish chem and bio tutorial TODAY! and nothing is done=.= CTs less than 2 weeks away. WOW.

i got rejected by the scholarship thingy. not that i think i am really good till i deserve it but there are students out there who dont deserve it at all gettg it. seriously, its just damn unfair. feeling damn dejected now. F.

2010-02-10T22:35:00.002+08:00

i am here again! i felt motivated to keep this blog gng all of a sudden! WHEEEE.

LOL. I LOVE SHOPPING WITH HUIYING!:D its damn niceeeeeeee HEHEHEHE. both of us bought a lot of stuffs and it feels super great seriously. we totally spammed and try and buy. (p.s we are NOT shopaholics) and i m all ready for new year with my new clothes and shoes and belt.

talking about belts makes me so angry, with myself-.-
i bought a white belt dnoe how many thousands years ago and lent it to my cousin. i forgot all abt it and bought another similar white belt. i realised i have 2 similar white belts when she returned me. just last week i searched high and low trying to find my belts, i couldnt find them, so i went to buy another white belt, of similar design AGAIN. but when i arrived home just now, i saw 3 freaking white belts on the sofa. (i have no idea where the 3rd one appeared from). so now i have 4 white belts of similar designs YAY.
stupid shit HAHAHHAHA.

thought about quite a bit of stuffs these few days. and yes, i have decided to take a step back, not care so much, so that i feel happier:D the 16PF report said that i need a lot of support from frens, and yeah, i got them from my favourite SHIT:D LOVE YOU GUYS!

2010-02-08T21:48:00.002+08:00

i am so tired tdy) : but the irony is that im still here to blog LOL

i officially hate mondays more and more and more. lessons are so packed, end at 3.40pm. then i had harmoc meetg with katie, xenia and yijie till 4.15pm. then go for H3 lesson. rush for harmoc right after that all e way till 7.30pm. ARGHS. i really hate mondays.

i am supposed to finish up arenes tutorial, photosynthesis tutorial and DE tutorial by tdy because teacher is gonna go thru them tmr SHIT.

2010-02-07T00:28:00.002+08:00

i got the motivatn to blog all of a sudden, perhaps because i was reading someone's blog... (huiying u might know who im toking abt!) HEHHHH. super happy can:D

tdy went for chingay traing, quite pointless. HAHs. went to bedok to collect contacts after that, then went airport with huiying to get valentine's presents. i only bought cookies for myself in e end. went to meet joyce after that and walk round chinatown and clarke quay area. (anyway, dont have to be guilty tartarbear because i didnt spend much in the end:D) central clothes not bad larhhh but didnt get anythg): i was super tired tt i slept the moment i reached hm all the way till 9+ pm when i woke up unwillingly.

i cant wear contacts now because my eyes swell up. blood vessels in my right eye burst and there is an ugly red patch): my tan line better not come back to me. i had a hard time gettg rid of it during orientatn k!

talking about orientatn, IT ROCKS. its amazing how everythg about us rocks haha! i think all the OGLs seriously put in a lot of effort and everyone bond well! it feels great to see how victorians work tgt towards a successful event(: and alphaeus, one i will never ever forget.

and sadly (yaa yaa very sadly), the clique is having problems agn. tired. dont wna care. i m happy now, tts all it matters. let me be selfish larh:D

STUDYING TMR WITH SHIT AGN!:D so long since i went with them hurray!(:

2010-01-13T22:41:00.002+08:00

): ):

i only blog when i feel upset. yes, upset.

i feel pointless gng to sch, when no ones putting in enuf effort. i just hope to do well this year. do really well. but, forget it.

mummy and daddy, just let me go k? just give me more freedom, the freedom i loathe all along. i promise, after one year, or maybe less than that, i will be back to be mummy's girl agn. just let me go for now, let me into a life where no studying is required, a life i whr i can simply heck care results, a life i care only about fun and frens.

its hard, to balance.

so much so of new year resolution, and the effort to work hard and get str8 As.

2009-10-12T21:43:00.003+08:00

i really want to find someone to tok to. i felt so terrible today. smsed her but turn out that she has her worries as well. so i shan't bother her. kept to myself.

i worry not only for my promo results, but hols attachments, PW, and worst of all the politics AGAIN. seriously why is this happening again and again? its so damn tiring can. i dont wna be the middleman and clear up mess alrdy. at least when such things happen to shit last time, we can accomodate and solve them almost immediately and i rly dont mind being the middleman back then because at least all of us have mature thinkings. but now, everyone sort of wants their own ways. all of us have different values, different thinkings. its so hard. whats more, i felt as though i am 2 headed snake sowing discord because i try to appease both sides and try to help them put in good words

i rly felt like crying before harmoc today and i was so tired, mentally. i dont even feel like doing anythg today. and we will be getting back results tmr=.=

all the more i feel like giving up when time goes on and on.
and i love my family more and more each day

2009-09-19T23:46:00.003+08:00

hahahaha i am back here while everyone's mugging mugging!

HUIYING! JIAYOU OKAY? WE ARE ALWAYS BEHIND U! WE WILL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR YOU! WE WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!:D
she is the heroine i admire the most among my frens i swear.

lagging behind studying schedule by so so so much that i threw my schedule away just now. because looking at it makes me feel duper stressed up):

i miss my LIFE alot. living a life now that doesnt belong to me. but well, i just treat it like an experience of the society. it will hopefully be better.

2009-09-09T20:53:00.001+08:00

i love this hols. meetg up with shit evryday and it rocks!

but whenever i thot of gng back to sch, the undone work, e assessment, and that i have yet to revise for promos, it sucks.

090909, SHIT:D

hope evrythg will go on fine for me

2009-09-04T00:07:00.002+08:00

useless yixin is blogging again. just now i was thinking, why am i blogging every single days nowadays?

and i figured, maybe i am stressd, i am sad. i dont like to bottle things up in my heart. but i hate to trouble and irritate shit now since they have their own problems too. so i will turn to my blog. best way out

peer pressure, i never used to understand this term. i just thought it was stupid. but now, e peer pressure i am facing is even worse than the stress i have from studies.
u guys forced me so.

2009-09-02T22:11:00.003+08:00

mixed feelings.

harmoc concert at esplanade ended today and it was great!(in my opinion) although there were some screw-ups but everyones quick enough to go back to rhe right beat and stuff. *CLAPS*

i was looking forward to today's concert, not because i cant wait to perform, but its that i cant wait for CCA to stop. harmoc is the only CCA stepping up practices till now, whereas other CCAs had a break like weeks ago. but after the performance i actually felt sad. maybe its because i didnt really treat today's performance seriously. there were quite a lot of audience, surprisingly. and the applause they gave made me realise, i m performing, not doing somethg just to get over it quickly. i enjoy playing harmoc, each and every single note, along with the feel and evrythg. i love the applause the audience gave after evry song we play, makes me feel motivated. i love the smiles on their faces when they enjoy the music we are playing. i love the smiles on the teachers' and mr tang's face when we played a wonderful piece and they really see our effort.
till now i realise, i should look forward to today's performance because i enjoy the music i am playing and want the audience to feel it too.

taking a squad is very different from leading a section. u take a sqd, u treat them as ur children. u teach them discipline, hard skills and through these, u make sure they learnt their soft skills.
a section on e other hand is totally different. they are not ur children, they are not obliged to listen to u at all. u have to treat them as ___. well, the blank there is not because its a word not to be disclosed. the fact is, i have yet to find out the answer. i will try hard to be a good SL, to make sectionals fun and enjoyable, to make u guys love music, and make u guys love harmoc AND last but not least, BOND(:

one thing that really made me feel touched: the efforts evryone from section 1 put in this time round. the remarkable improvements ur showed(:

now back to reality. stupid chem test tmr. i am feeling so tired to even look at the notes.

tomorrow will be a freaking long and unbearable day):
chem test, triple math, triple GP and boring econs tutorial.
rushing down to bedok south police centre for PW interview
rush to jiaying's hse for tuition. oh shit i have yet to complete the tuition work):

then i predict i cant get enough sleep like any other thursdays and friday will be hell for me again.

there will be double prac! eeyer. and have to rush home to study and prepare for chem tuition.

AND YAY! HOLIDAYS!:D or rather, one week study break =.=

2009-08-28T21:54:00.004+08:00

arghhhhhhhhhhhs i am such a loser. i feel super screwd up again. retarded seriously why am i feeling like that again and again? perhaps JC life just ain't suited for me. perhaps i shouldn't whine. for readers who think that i am such a bitch and whines non-stop, i wont bother. well, tts my freedom of speech.

this morning went to library to study over the 3 free periods because i dont wna stay at concourse. reason is simple, theres no noise level control at concourse and pple start toking and screaming, including me. joyce nadiah and me went to the library, hoping to have a more condusive environment but can u believe that actually library is a good bitching place too? we started all sorts of nonsense, gossiping blahhhhh. bio lecture was boring and eunice forgot to bring my notes. so i practically wasted 2 periods inside doing nothing.

it was towards the end of it when evrythg started to become so damn funny. a guy from another class kept leaning his head backwards and its damn bloody irritating because it felt like he's trying to upskirt joyce and lean on her legs. the 2 of us were terribly pissed so we came up with a plan. joyce hold a pen such that the tip is facing the back of the head of the guy and when he leans backwards, the pen will poke into his flesh. but the retarded thing is, after we hold the pen in that position, he did not lean backwards anymore. so we just continued to copy the notes on the slides. WHILE we were copying, his head lean backwards again. so joyce immediately stopped writing and poked damn hard into his flesh. the guy scream @.@ then joyce was acting damn demure by apologising and stuffs but we were laughing damn hard at e back HEEx anyway, we should have used the tip of a mechanical pencil because its sharper.

math bio and chem tutorial after that zomg and i managed to survive through though i fell aslp for a minute or two during bio but still, pat on e back yixin!

went to meet xenia and other harmoc pple after that to go eat! super cool. luckily all of us eat a lot (perhaps thats a harmoc tradition) so e amount i eat is like insignificant to them(: finally theres once where i keep buying and eating and no one commented yay (somemore theres always other pple buying and eating with me throughout)

rehearsal was quite a failure for harmoc band yucks.

rushed home for chem tuition after that and here i am blogging. GP essay due tmr and what e heck am i doing here?!

things to be done:
- GP essay!
- organic chem practices
- study chem bonding

tmr will be another tiring day i predict) : harmoc + tuition then i should be coming home straight to study! yes i should i should i should:D

AND MY STUPID PHONE SPOIL AGAIN. although its only the buttons this time round=.= but hey, w/out the buttons, what can u do with a phone? (when my phone isnt a touch screen, stupid calvin-.-)

2009-08-26T19:13:00.002+08:00

i took up one more tuition again. and this time round i m doubly upset. not because i dont want e tuition. in fact, i asked for this tuition on my own accord. but the way my mum agreed readily despite the problems my family is facing now makes me super guilty. moreover this tuition is more expensive than the other 2. sighs. i know my parents care a lot for me, always trying their best to meet up with my demands and stuffs. yet i always show attitude to them just because i feel stressed up and feel irritated. i always reply my mum with one word replies and my stupid ears carried out the selective hearing on my mum) :

promos in 30 days time, or 29 days in just a few hrs time.
mummy i hope i can do u proud this time round. i promise to try my best, my very best. i will ignite the spark in me, just as eunice said. i just hope that my headache+heavy eyelids wont come and find me.

LOVE U AND THANK YOU MUMMY!

sounds damn mushy here. but if i dont say it here, i wont have the courage to say these in front of her. i know she wont be able to see it, but... its alright i guess.

havent even finish my revision for bio SPA. hopefully everythg goes well tmr awwwww

things to be done by tonight!!!:
- study for bio SPA (7.5%! here i come!)
- math integration hw
- study organic chem T.T
- read up on GP essays

judging from the time now, i wont be able to complete them, but its always good to aim further:D

i couldnt help but to think. but in the end i get nothing but distractions.

2009-08-25T23:16:00.002+08:00

this sucks sucks sucks to the core.

by right the above should apply to SPA, or rather, my progress for studying for SPA. but now, no. read jiaying and huiying's blog. so angry and disappointed with myself for not being able to be by their side when they are down. to think 2 weeks ago they are listening to my rantings so patiently and now i cant take my time off for them. yes, my problems are kinda solved, but what bout theirs?

jiayou pleaseeeeeeeeeeeee!

2009-08-17T21:23:00.002+08:00

ARGHS i am having a terrible headache now and i feel damn tired. supposed to study larh wth man.

nvmnvm, i should stop scolding myself. its time to give myself a pat on the back because i managed to finish my math assignments and half of math tutorial ytd(: i just completed my EoM draft 3 and shall send for marking tmr, get it back tmr, edit it tmr, hand in final draft on wednesday and one more worry down!:D (always look on the bright side of life rmbr?)

huiying and i were crapping just now. yes craps but i felt so happy and relaxed and most imptly, MYSELF, when i tok to secondary school frens.
AND yes i shall blog a bit about huiying's birthday surprise which is super funny! we know we cant make fun of her no matter what so we leave it to fish&co! HAHA. she had her doubts initially when the staffs kept singing the birthday rap, but when its gng to be her turn, she is shocked too. HAHA
damn cool can! she had to stand on chair and blow candles HAHA. i was laughing throughout especially cause we are super enthu and made a lot of noise. the guys were trying hard to shout and scream, resulting in their faces looking like they are having cramps i couldnt help it but laugh. so fun so fun!:D i bet huiying enjoyed herself alot too!

this week will be damn tiring) : simply having the thought of it makes me wna puke.
today i m all drained from PE, tutorials, PW discussions and rushing to harmoc after that. then upon reaching home i did EoM.
tmr is full of lectures and school ends at 2.30pm. it will be abt 3.45pm when i reach home. i shall dedicate the rest of the day to econs market structure which is a big topic and it kills.
wednesday is supposedly my damn free day where i can accomplish a lot but theres stupid PW seminar yuckkkkkkkkkks dnoe how long it will last laa. even if i have no seminar, there is harmoc rehearsal.
thursday, needless to say, is the worst day every week. 4 periods of math and 3 periods of GP. i have to go for harmoc, then RUSH, and i really mean RUSH to jiaying's hse for tuition all e way till 9.30pm
friday 4 periods of practical. cross fingers and pray that there will not be harmoc pleaseeeeee

i hope i can pull through this week man-.-

2009-08-16T20:58:00.002+08:00

thanks to those who have been comforting me over past 2 weeks, when my brain screws suddenly went loose and all my thinkings went haywired. i dnoe why too hahs. a lot of pple said that i looked damn stressd up last week, but thanks to evryone out there( :

promos is coming and can you believe it? i planned to study a lot this weekend but i wasted it away. only manage to complete WR and EoM. i am so tired when i have the thought of completing work. dad has been forcing me to go tuition after he saw my report card. school forced me to drop one subject to H1 right now but i m trying to appeal.

got new GP tuition where its super stressful zomg. the teacher really want you to do your work and speak up, and she even asked me to write answer on the board blah blah. although i learnt quite a bit from the discussions and stuffs, but its so scary T.T
next is gettg econs + chem tuition i think. recommendations anyone?

so off i go to:
1) do MI assignment
2) conics assignment
3) functions tutorial
3) biology practice papers
4) organic chem tutorial (supposed to be done long ago)
5) study for econs market structure test
6) STUDY FOR PROMOS yucks.

hopefully coming week will be peaceful, productive and not tiring( :

2009-08-11T20:22:00.002+08:00

she failed. haha what a joke. to think she actually went to school with more confidence today, looking forward to a better day, but its worse than hell for her. what she has been doing is wrong. what she has been thinking is wrong. theres always a better one out there girl. she is gng back, and try to get used to it, try to accept it, or even, try to make a difference. she hoped she found someone who can help her. she hope this decision of hers will be right.

hahh. my mum asked me a qn today: you wna go poly not?
i lowered my head, looked down and said yes.
she replied: it doesnt matter.

well :D

2009-08-08T22:24:00.003+08:00

im supposed to do my work now. econs project 1000word critics and proj work-.-
but then i decided to blog 1st

i m happy now, though evrythg is still rather uncertain, but i m willing to give it a try. forget about that clique yup? i told jiaying, no matter how much u like to leave, u cant bear to. yeah tts how i felt. now, i will tell myself not to feel this way.

she is looking for a college life she wants. its not just about studying, but about putting in effort for the remaining one and a half years. she is gng to try joing a grp of rly good influence. and i hope she can make it.

thanks JIAYING:D she has been shopping with me for these 2 days, keepg me accompany and rly talk to me, comfort me, teach me what to do. love you^^
not forgettg huiying ad ruiling. HUIYING! jiayou too kk?

jiayou yixin!:D

2009-08-06T23:54:00.002+08:00

i feel lost, yet in btwn seemingly found my directions. some very uncertain directns...

thanks yijie xenia jiaying huiying and ruiling!:D yup. we all miss chung cheng. only when u step into a mini society, then u realise how innocent the pple arnd u were. i know i have been damn emo this period of time. bear with me? haha. maybe i will just get used to everythg or maybe i can find a way out.

2009-08-03T22:21:00.004+08:00

i didnt go school today. and i dont want to either. had cough and i dont want to get scolded further because of that.

life sucks to the core. sometimes i really consider hard on whether i should switch to poly. i still have to go to school one day no matter how many days i skipped isnt it? lols. i think i will be the 1st person u guys can ever find regrettg gng to vjc? what exactly am i worryg about? sometimes i think i shouldnt be worryg because huiying is in e same plight as me(or maybe worse?) and she is still so strong. what bout me?

i just hope evrythg will get better. 1 and a half year more, i am not sure if i can hang on.

53 days to promos):

2009-07-19T00:56:00.002+08:00

just a quick post before i m off to bed!

this morning was a blast! hahas. ruiling is still as innocent as ever so we managed to trick her and celebrated her birthday with at least a teeny weeny tinge of surprise:D after that went to take pictures at jiaying's hse using ruiling's laptop its duper fun and lets do it again guys!

after that was shopping tgt with vanessa and joyce at her so called territory CENTRAL. the place is, quite nice, reminds me of KLP, where there's very little pple. i had a liking for 3 clothes and i bought none like wth right?! scared papa scold larh. he not happy with my conduct these days as i reached home at 9+ for this whole week and today, 11+.

class outing.. harry potter was quite nice. hahas. the ending a bit abrupt though, totally ruin the whole show. dinner was quite fun larh. playing of games blah blah. shan't elaborate much because.... *ahem*

sry girls for not being able to go NLB tmr. i will be staying at home to do EoM and WR.

2009-07-16T23:08:00.002+08:00

today made me realise so many things. made me realise i m such a bitch. made me realise how disgusting i m. made me realise how stupid i was. why cant i put myself in others' shoes? why cant i just let go of certain things? why cant i just have my own stand and stop being somebody else's dog? why cant i just follow my heart?

i admit. i m easily influenced by pple. but today vanessa and carolyn totally reminded me, how sad she will be. well, now to think of it, i realise how strong she is. if its me, i wouldnt have even attended school. i would have alrdy transferred sch. how i hope 09s38 will really be a happy family like how we are before. i hope we slowly make a difference.

just now as we were toking, vanessa was describing her sec4 class, and that really reminds me of 4LY. the best class. no political problems at all. yes, there were cliques, but the inter-clique bondings, the amount of fun and laughter we have as a whole class. AWWWWW. perhaps i take the fun and peacefulness in 4LY for granted. the sense of security when gng to school back in chung cheng. the feeling of looking forward to school and having lessons with 4LY, i wonder when can i have that feeling with s38, judging from the situation now.

sometimes, i detest gng school. sometimes, living in yor own bubble is a good thing afterall.

2009-07-15T23:06:00.003+08:00

so long since i last blogged. hhahahahha. i can nvr keep my blog alive larh):

exams over. now, the scariest part is the results! life in VJ is ever so competitive. pple always play and play and nvr study in e end their results soar like nobody's business.

life after midyrs is even more tiring. have been sleeping at 12+ these days. pw has been taking up so much of my time. somemore the tutors seemed to be more scary. they start threatening us that if we dont complete our work they will send us out of class. well, i havent do tmr's math and econs.
and tmr, friday, sat and sun will be much much worse.
tmr will be interviews after school. friday will be practicals):
sat will be birthday celebratn + class outing
sunday will be some uni fair.

i thought i could relax, u know.

HAHA, and i did. this whole afternn(:
went out with SHIT to a pinch of salt for the $6 buffet. HAHA. damn cool. the food is very very nice! worth trying. and we played monopoly. no one went bankrupt this time round. mostly its a fight betwn jiaying and huiying, negotiating with each other about selling and buying hses... jiaying keep going into xiaohui's vehicle and paid more than thousands of dollars for it, xiaohui that snail crawling so slowly and me, always gng into jail-.-
the game was funny. xh's money was funny(inside joke) and e part whr i took xh's token by mistake kept me laughing for dnoe how long. HEEEEE

after the game we went back to chung cheng! visited MR SO! omg. he's still so funny, his hamster is still so smart. we tricked him like nobody's business and i said i took TSD, he believed and look at me with the 'OMG' look. huiying's from track and xiaohui took computing. jiaying took india studies and joined indian dance. mr so was so amazed he kept repeating that JC life is fantastic HAHA. he's still as sacarstic and funny as ever. i will go back chung cheng again. SOON. REAL SOON.

off to my math tutorial and assignment!):
CRYYYYY

2009-05-18T22:57:00.002+08:00

counting down to holidays! i hope this hols wont disappoint me yeah?
give me alot of free time to go through my work, study and play too!:D

9 more days? or more? they say we are going to have a full day soon! yayy yippee

fell in love with music once again(: as in playing different instruments. changing scores to different types (playing piano and guitar with harmoc scores) and playing harmoc and piano scores. heehee.
but i feel stressd up too):

GPP research - by thursday
Econs 30marks CSQ - by thursday
TUTORIALS

tmr hopefully i have nothing on so that i can complete evrythg by tmr
wednesday n thursday filled with harmoc

2009-05-17T20:53:00.002+08:00

i m rly tired. really.

going to school is like a torture to me now. i dread going to school. its just like a phobia. its not like the pple in vj are not nice whadsoever. its just that work piling up seems to suffocate me. whads more, i feel so tired to even look at them. everyday upon reaching home i would just bathe eat and sleep. even so, i still feel very tired. i know i have to buck up, i know.

weekends are the best, it would mean hanging out with my girls. even ytd night sleepover at jiaying's hse made me super happy. miss the days in chung cheng whr i look forward to school cux of them. i wna have more sleepovers, although ytd was just chats but still, i feel really happy(:

3 months already. havent got use to school life? JC hectic life? exams are coming. i wna score well. i donwan to fail. i don wish history to repeat itself.

sometimes i just wonder.. why?
and sometimes i just hate myself

2009-05-15T21:48:00.003+08:00

hectic life i want another full day to rest larh

the school is so mean, 09s38 only got 1 match support, and tts not even a match larh, tts like, track events=.= other classes got 2 really exciting match supports already.
PLEASE PLEASE, i want match support. at least no needa attend lessons. hmms, although i dont mind full day(:

HAHA. shit. after going vjc my mind is all abt full day. ever since the very very funny morning assembly

D.M: do u know mas selamat was arrested?
school: FULL DAY ** FULL DAY ** ... ...
mr chan: victorians, now's not the time to shout full day...
someone: HALF DAY!

LOLs. but in e end, we didnt manage to get it. nvm. 2 more weeks and the holidays are here although i can predict it will be burnt. eeewww. with mid year preps, harmoc stuffs blah blah.

hope SHIT can spend more time tgt this hols man. SLEEPOVER PLEASEEEEE:D

feeling damn screwd up. lagging behind in ALL subjects. hate this feeling. worse than 'O's. at least back then i dont feel tired after i reach home and can study quite a bit. but now after i reach home everyday, bathe eat sleep. dnoe how i spent all my energy in school evryday also.

WEEKENDS would mean freaking FOUR HOURS of harmoc tmr and tuition. when can i get a good rest?):

2009-04-28T20:38:00.002+08:00

i dnoe how to desribe my life now. screwd? fun? enjoyable? draining?
there are so many things i wna tok about but i dnoe where to start from...

SLV. yupyup SLV is damn nice! the kids are so cute. there's this little girl whom i think is only 2 years old, and she hugged + kissed me:D HEEx. she gave me a pat on the back too! duper cute omg. if i can get the photos from nad i will post it up! culinary today is alright i guess? quite tiring cux shiyun and i have to handle 4 kids at a go. and 1 is hyperactive. I MISS THE KIDS NOW OMG.

PW sets in. as in, final PI was in, no more amendments blah blah. now is GPP. eeyer. i don get why VJ teachers like to rush through PW man. other JCs are still at 2nd or 3rd draft nia. i rushed my last 3 drafts within 5 days damn cool larh. but now my group is great! its like, all damn hyper and alot of ideas, although our efficiency is quite low cux we keep laughing:x

love morning assemblies now man. cheering for full day evryday n its damn cool. i don care how pple poke fun at the over enthusiasm of VJ haha we are born this way. someone even made a banner " WE WANT FULL DAY" damn cool larh zomg.

AND YES! I WANT FULL DAY! i need a... lets say study break or somethg, so that i can catch up on my work and stuffs): terrible. I LOOK FORWARD TO JUNE HOLS and cross fingers please please no stuffs to burn it! i need to study for mid years RAWR.

i m lagging behind in my studies):
esp. chem and math. it doesnt mean that my bio and econs arent lagging. its just that they nvr lag as much mmm.
chem energetics1 n 2 and ionic equilibrium1!
math is ... evrythg? luckily there is ms tan! i feel damn safe under her. the way she teach is like damn good. she makes me understand!:D YAYYE.

tmr will be a slack and boring day i think. investiture blah blah..
HOPE THURSDAY WILL BE A FULL DAY:D

2009-04-03T22:23:00.013+08:00

APRIL FOOL WAS A BLAST!

okay, so jiaying was tricked by me. my joke was so so so obvious. i sent her sms:

me: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY FRIEND!

jiaying: today not my birthday whad=.=

jiaying: WAHLAO! early in the morning kena tricked by you!

MUAHAHAHAs super super damn funny.

09s38 rocks.

our class guys and girls exchanged bottoms. that is, girls wear pants and guys wear skirts. the guys are the ones who are damn excited abt it, can your imagine?!

so evryone surrounded us like we are some animals from the zoo and started taking pictures and videos, especially of the guys. whad did my dear classmates do?! THEY POSED. the guys did seductive poses like WTH. moreover, they folded their skirt until its damn short on purpose larh! rayan wore the skirt wrongly.

me: ... u wore the skirt wrongly laa! the zip should be at the back!

rayan: nvm, sexy can already (with a sexy pose)

i nearly puke hahaha. k laa fine. he looked fine in skirt seriously. so our class formed a train line during our break while some other classes still having lecture. (mind you, girls are still in pants and guys still in skirts) we went into the lecture theatre and tour one round, shout " SORRY WRONG LECTURE" then ran out! DAMN FUNNY omg. the stupid gay lecturer was stunned! HAHA.

econs lecture was damn funny cux the girls are peacefully concentratg in their pants (it bring warmth) and the guys were complaining that their short skirts made them super cold. LOLs

biology even more funny. cux we scare mr chong using a fake cockroach. we simply left it on the duster and when he was abt to pick it up, he screamed, with both his hands in the air HAHA.

he asked the guys to write the answers on the board on purpose so as to see them in skirts and he whacked kaymond's butt, tts damn gross! ewwwww

couple~

another couple~ OPPS

Miss 09s38

My LOVE KATIE!

the coolest men ever :X

6 cute guys 1 chio bu :X

bio lesson~

today went out with my girls to bugis!:D jiaying and huiying. xiaohui is not present): talked a lot alot, and i said somethg so mean bout shirong even the shopkeeper(who dnoe shirong) laughed. HAHA. we bought the "i love my girlfriends" shirt. jiaying got the yellow one, huiying brown, xiaohui green and me, purple! heehee:D we will wear on sunday!

i simply love chatting and playing and making a fool out of ourselves with my girls!

2009-03-21T23:20:00.003+08:00

i hate to say this, but now...

I HATE BIOLOGY.. E-LEARNING. haha strictly e-learning. BIOLOGY IS STILL MY LOVE:D
realise how veejay teachers really encourage independent learning and its seriously driving me nuts. the 1st assignment gave me lots of stress and now the 2nd one wont spare me either.

i still have lots of holiday homework to complete. veejay seriously has too much life larh. evryone is playing and playing): i can predict how i will struggle in future if this continues. and i m already struggling now. playing in school + attempting to mug at home doesnt work cause i cant change my mood just as i wish.

Econs essay! Chem tutorial! Bio assignment! Math assignment! = DEAD ):

nevertheless, my dear girls are able to save me tomorrow:D

2009-03-20T21:08:00.002+08:00

my eyes resembles that of 2 straight horizontal lines now. so tired.

ytd was so memorable! went squash with jiaying. I GOT BALL SENSE OKAY?! fine jiaying would say im lying again HAHA. at least i sweat during the game, from all the ball picking=.= squash is fun! thanks to my coach cheng jiaying!:D

went to meet up with the class after bathing. MINDS CAFE ROCKS. HAHA. for us, FLY! played a lot of games, laughed screamed attracted unnecessary attention and BOND, even though we are already very bonded :X HAHAHA
BIG TABOO is fun. the potential artists, clowns were all shown. most funny part i rmbrd was me and chinkiat OMG. he was drawing some pictures to illustrate "BASEBALL". i knew exactly what he's trying to arrive at, so i keep swinging the monkey like how i swing the bat. we were both damn agitated cux i couldnt rmbr whads the name of the sports, then we all go "AHH! AHH!.." and changyi shouted "TIME'S UP". =.= you shud have seen chinkiat's pekchek face. super funny.
played the headband thing too. had lots of fun too!

went to eat japanese food after that. its kind of worth it. ate sushi and ramen, had green tea add up to 15bucks. nevertheless, its the joy and fun we all get! went shopping and then to mac's to BOND. yeah, we all bond in a really special way - HAVING DEBATES, QUARRELS, ARGUEMENTS, all sorts of nonsense except to talk peacefully, DAMN FUNNY LARH.

jessie's mum was so kind to send yongyi, edward and me home:D tts when i realise jessie lived really close to me omg=.= CLASSMATES for 2 years. she sat just in front of me. we always laughed together and i dnoe. whad a joke man.

TODAY!
shan't blog much except for the popular fair! YAYYE. SPAM G'SOFT! i bet a lot dnoe whad im toking bout HMPH!

shan't utter nonsence anymore. have to do biology assignment, YIXIN BE A GOOD GIRL:D

2009-03-18T21:57:00.008+08:00

so long since i bloggd. OK. determined to save my blog kay? :D
so many things to blog abt. but i forgot-.-

let me blog bout today! I love my girls!

a long wait for jiaying and huiying at the airport i almost starve to death. so they arrived at almost the same time just before i collapsed onto the floor. went wang's. OMG, its been a long time since i stepped into any wang's outlet. miss them alot! the thing is, i saw mei, jan and shujun=.= mei paid for our meal. so bu hao yi si can?! T.T e 3 of us ate laksa. YUMMY. its damn good its damn good! GO TRY EVRYBODY:D

we went to study next. okay. only huiying studied. i understand and did the 1st qn of chem. the rest of the time im chatting with jiaying. its okay, she's worth my time:D

then we wanted to buy water bottles but huiying ran away=.= but jiaying insisted on buying it even when we got onto the train so we are going back on friday! if i can go back wang's hopefully i wont get to meet the managers and i can try the curry chicken rice yayy!

tmr jiaying darling is teaching me how to play squash and 4LY outing after that yay! cant wait to meet the rest of them. I MISS THEM LARH. ARGH!): thinking about them makes me emo

do we look like we are from the same school?

well, we from HWA CHONG can!

I LOVE MY GIRLS:D

The guys are the back look damn wrong=.=

2009-01-20T21:57:00.003+08:00

hope posting results will come out soon and school will start( :
working is no fun. studying is great. trust me.

whoops yaa anyway, albert is going sydney to study~ awww. so gonna miss him man. he will be back to singapore on 29th jan and flying on 1st of feb again. yupps, and we are so going to meet up? Rachel Huiying Cheryl! All to turn up okie?
yup, so had a lame msn convo with him this afternoon. we were toking out scholarships for studying medicine.

Albert: you should go apply for scholarship. just show them your 'O' level results and they will pay for your 6 years school fees straight.
Me: oh my, pay for u? (whad i meant here is university)
Albert: No... pay for you.
Me: zzz zzz

still got some funny ones but i couldnt rmbr. LOLs. toking to albert is still so pek chek:P

so today i manage to irritate doggie gerald. WAHLAO. i kena barked at=.= just a small favour from him can. and its like helping him cux he is a slacker in his company. at least i give him a job related to banking isnt it? stoopid uncle) :

GP tuition GP tuition, any recommendations?
by e way, YIXIN IS TAKING A LEVEL next year? if she get into a JC laa

2009-01-16T15:34:00.004+08:00

fine i submitted my JAE application. VJ as my 1st choice. and i regretted. WAHLAO. okok, i mean, i really like VJ, but i called Hwa Chong JC after i submitted my application they said i can apply for scholarship there. whad the hell can. if i had know this in the 1st place, i would have applied for hcjc. called mum and asked her whether i shud change my choice, her answer made me feel like she regarded my future as nothing laa.

she was just concerned whether she need to pay a single cent or not for my future. she dont care whether there is any scholarship around laa. i just wna go to a school with good teachers get it?!

enough of all these. i rly had enough of these nonsense. cant they just praise me or somethg? like how my auntie keep calling me up and encourage me blah blah.

so now, hope im able to get into VJ lo.. i donwan to go TJ): HOHO.

OKAY. enough of results.

4 LOYALTY CHALET ROCKS OKAY!

FLY FLY FLY!

another chalet this year okay? yesyes, this year again(:

love the bbq, cycling, mahjong, heart attack, chit-chats, xbox, PROM NIGHT(*ahem*), movie session, tortise game + the DARE. to wake Eng Sheng up by pouring ice over his body. although it failed T.T

and thank goodness there is celeste mama around who cook the chicken wings for us. (BBQ-ing chicken wings are far too long) so celeste simply cook it on the stove. YUMMY okay?!

after that went to the room and tok with emilene yongyi jingshen jianfeng blah blah. ohgawd. i made a stupid comment. WAHLAO. shouldnt put it here cause its so malu.. (although i told a lot of pple liao)

i love the prom night.. ahem. screams & screams were heard and then followd by laughter which is obviously by me. OKAY. i bet most of u dont understand, but FLY will understand:D

lets just the rest of the things as ~~secret~~? haha. lazy blog liao...

I <3>

2008-12-22T22:01:00.002+08:00

HAHAHA. im blogging after i leave my blog dead for exactly 3 months.

suddenly miss 4Loyalty a lot! i don wna miss the chalet): hope i can get leave or somethg. I MUST GO FOR THE CHALET AND BBQ:D

wonderg how i would fare for 'O' level.. wonderg how many papers of mine have been marked..

2008-09-18T23:21:00.002+08:00

no doubt that my results are still disappointing, judging from the reactions my parents give. i tried hard this time round. not hard enough, i know. looking back, actually i did very very little. yesyes, last lap. i shud just run and run and run towards the ending point. but its hard. cux i might fall. no studying mood now, thats one thing for sure. im trying hard to force studying mood out of me.(at least im shure, for pple who do not wish to believe me) LOLs. i failed my biology. surprise? nope. but i was hoping for a higher mark. chemistry was only a B4. i was aiming higher as well. C.H was worse. i improved by quite abit, but still wayway below my expectations. one more month to 'O' and im still here struggling.

meetg with financial crisis now, my big appetite kills. LOLs. i have to control!
just a random post cux i was doing a situational writing and wish to take a break from it. LOLs. jiayou evryone though. start studying before its too late!:D

2008-09-16T22:11:00.003+08:00

RAWR.
RAWR.
RAWR.
well, since everyone is blogging ~~happily~~ bout prelim results today, i shall do it too:D

oh whadevr, i was shaking terribly between xinyi teo and zhujun when receiving my english results. i mean, tts shouldnt be the case as it is so not yixin to actually feel scared in receiving results. LOLs. but i put in quite a lot of effort this time round + i didnt finish summary and situational(i only did one objective out of 4?). i had a dream ytd that i got 7/30 for situational and raistlina was screaming at me. that explains why im scared while receiving my papers?
ahem, more imptly, note who am i sitting with laa. XINYI the oral dragon=.= 40/40 for oral + compo pro. left side is ZHUJUN the mad woman who got 25/30 for her personal recount. *STRESS YIXIN* ):
i passed overall SURPRISINGLY. whadevr laa. was so happy there was further moderatn but in e end it doesnt make much difference for me. LOLs. C5 in e end.

next was HCL in LT1. i thot i would fail it cux this time round the teachers super stingy. and i didnt hit the points blah blah. in the end gort another C5=.= but at least a pass(which is not enough, though).

tomorrow:
emaths (only hope)
physics (sorry mr chua if i did badly this time round):
ss (expected to fail so sorry ms gan):

jiaying is super good at words now, beware people! LOL

2008-09-14T18:01:00.002+08:00

35 more days to olevel, no more time to waste! no more time to waste!
i will be resting for 5 more days, to finish watching 2 hongkong series and i promise to start studyg(: PLEASE.
anyway, prelims was a disaster(?) fine, Emaths wasnt really one. haha. one nia. hope i will have As and no fails this time round which is like impossible.

i really hate some people to a great extent. i did try to work hard for prelims, its not like im still very much attached to NP. expectd me to score very badly. whad a nice sentence to say bout yor student. im yor student, and im trying very very hard, yet yu thot that i did nothg bout my studies? yu are so wrong bout me. yor job is to push me up, nort to be happy when i got bad results just because yu expected it this way. whad bullshit. just to tell yu that, the pressure and stress im facing is not lesser than yor model student out there okay.
-enough of fury and scoldings-

friday went JP to support Alex. i was caught on tv, hope they wont show that part. LOL. i found a damn cute baby there, 11 months old. my little hubby. SUPER DUPER CUTE. and guess whad, i manage to kiss his cheek! LALALA. dont even know him:P
went to play arcade, throw ball game. we broke the high score. (see huiying's blog for more info) its damn fun, and all passer-bys, esp a group of fuhua guys scolded us mad. LOL. who cares laa.
anyway, xiaohui cheer up okay? WE ARE ALWAYS THE PRIORITY HOR:D:D:D:D

huiying huiying huiying!~ lets go pasar malam tonight and play the throw ball game! HEHE. lets go stroll at the playground with a lantern. STRICTLY NO SPARKLERS thankyou so much(:

2008-09-06T00:50:00.002+08:00

im updating, like finally again! whee! although no one visits): SOBSOB.
guess evryone is mugging like hell, cux i read hewei's blog, that pervert finished almost anythg and evrythg. GAWD. im done for this time, again? =.=
at least i tried, i tried and i tried very very hard(: i studied laa, but now looking back, it seems like nothing went inside my head D:
i only did practices. unlike the rest who simply read and memorise textbks. i cant. i just did a bit of qns here and there): thot it was a great achievement yu know, but now i know it is not):

E.geog Amath Chem Biology!

jiayou and good luck to evryone. and to LY warriors and dragons:D

2008-08-13T19:05:00.002+08:00

RAWR.RAWR.RAWR.RAWR.RAWR.
i.should.be.studying
i.should.be.studying
i.should.be.studying
i.should.be.studying

prelims is 8 days away. o level oral is 8 days away. yet still no motivatn):
ms kwek say this time english very difficult, GG laa. 4LY wna be compre warrior de, NONO!):
pple, give me some motivatn pls? my eyelids are so heavy when it meet the books. whaddahell.
this is just a lame post to kill my boredom im so sry.

2008-08-11T00:06:00.002+08:00

im very high now cause i just finished watching brown sugar chivalries ep3(: the next episode gonna be great!

thursday
sleepover at jiaying's hse with xiaohui, huiying. 4 girls can get really wild in the middle of the night yu know, not only guys. i was really hungry(as usual) then jiaying and i started rummaging her kitchen:D cook a hell lot of food in the end i ate the most. HAHA. yes, girls hate supper tts why, but apparently im not a girl. bleahxD we took a video, but tts definitely not gonna be posted. its an obscene video. LOL. <3 our girl power okay!

friday
woke up and started to change. i wore the class tee and our FBT red shorts, super cool! so look forward to the X-country with 4LOYALTY! we each had a flag to wave, even ms kwek and mr chua had their share! got one flag extra and since ms lam seemed so fascinated by the whole class waving our flags during the first song after national anthem, we gave her the extra one. she super cute sia(: put it in her bag behind her and keep showing off to other classes!

we got so high and took real lots of pictures. gonna post them when i get them from ashlyn(:

super fun! competed with modesty in the "singing of birthday song" cause its celeste's birthday:D the run was a very bad one for me, but the walk with LOYALTY back to the ending point is good. we sang all the way, till the last stretch we ran as a whole and scream throughout. zhenwei was running beside me, she screamed, then i screamed. once we reached the ending point, the whole queue was filled with LY girls, waiting looked so confused! HAHA.
kept cheering and we all shouted into ms kwek's ears, cheered for her and made her so malu. she was trying to cover her face but she failed. LOL.

the best part of the day, cheering! gave out the whistles i bought the day earlier. i was still quite afraid that the rest dont like the idea. but nono, they all fought for the whistles(?) HAHA. i bought 12 only. shud have bought more): the whole singing session with LOYALTY is great because even the guys who thot all the girls were crazy(as we cheered, jumped wildly, waved our flags frantically, behaving like mad women) joined in and got more crazy than us(: so we had a great time. we all cheered and sang the songs so loudly as a whole, then respect shud be jealous or somethg bombed us in the middle of the song=.= luckily we were quick-witted. we bombed them back and continued cheering as if nothg has happend(:
congrats to nicole for gettg 6, and congrats to the class for gettg 2nd for most patriotic award! heehee. even mr soon was praising the loyaltians, saying:
we are LOYAL not only to the singapore but oso to our school(cause we are wearing sch ties) and to our class(simply because we are loyalty!) YAYYYYYE! <3 LOYALTY.

after that went ktv with jiaying huiying and xiaohui(: HAHAHA. super fun! everythg there was great laa. but we wont revealed so much, just that:

-if yu ask huiying to choose songs, she will say "dont kajiao me, im eating"
-jiaying tempo very cute de! HAHA
-xiaohui bladder super small.
-me? im mad woman! :D

someday we go sing again yea? HOTPOT TOO! it smells greatttttt:D

2008-08-02T22:20:00.002+08:00

im currently waiting for hei tang qun xia zhuan. GAHGAHGAH! im addicted to it):
im bored): and im demoralised by my oral results.

byebye.

2008-07-26T21:06:00.002+08:00

hmms, how shud i start this post?

THANKS
HUIYING JIAYING XIAOHUI GERALD RUILING DETIAN TANJIN HEWEI NEVIN JINXUE

hahahas. today gort CI interview, kinda alright i guess. even if i screwd it up, its a good screw, HAHA. cux i enjoyed myself during the interview, kinda crap my way through, but hope officers know whad i m trying to arrive at. waited for 4 hours before my interview RAWR. but had a great time with zhuangyi ma'am, huiying, jiaying, sijia, hewei, detian. we crap like siao. 4 hrs of boredom, we did a lot of stupid things. (pple's IQ can drop when they are very bored yu know) so sijia told us lots of _____ jokes. then she went in for her interview. we were so bored, and huiying startd to write zhuangyi maam's 11minutes of life. i bet yu dnoe whad im toking bout. LALALA.

went for tuition after that. damn sian sia. i was wantg to sleep. my brain cant even function. nearly cried during tuition. pretend im yawning HAHA! damn suck sia. on the way home keep holding back my tears. but in my mind, i was thinkg bout the surprise hy they all giving, cux gort a feelg that the surprise is today yu know(im too smart laa no choice HAHAHA jokejoke). then i thot, if my great pals were to appear in front of me at that moment, i sure breakdown. LOL.
on the way home damn scary. esp when i walk along the void deck, i thot my great pals hiding behind walls to scare me can.

THANKS GUYS. i shan't say anythg bout the surprise, its simply too great:D only we shall know okie?
i dnoe whad to say seriously, thanks and sorry for the trouble.

thanks huiying for providing us the battlefield and trying to clean up!
thanks jiaying for putting in so much effort to lure me away or somethg!
thanks baby for coming down after piano lesson, my heart pain worhs!
thanks detian for yor sore eye and rush down after yor tuition!
thanks tanjin for yor cool gun and stayg so late even when yor dinner is waiting for yu at home!
thanks gerald for being so "da4 fang1" and let us play with yor face till its FULL of cream!
thanks hewei for coming down and help out, even though somethg crop up, but i still appreciate it!
thanks ruiling for having yor spirit with us, omg that sounds scary!
thanks nevin for... erm... yor haircut, HAHA!
thanks jinxue for having the thought of coming down? even though yu pangsehed them last minute!

I <3 you guys!:D

2008-07-24T22:07:00.003+08:00

i looked at my dead blog and had a sudden urge to save it. HAHAHA. although i know i will fail. fine fine, my blog will be officially on hiatus, until after prelims maybe:) praise me for being a good girl laa! although i now spend my time in front of the teevee.

today, another tiring day. tmr will be a long day):
nvmnvm, i spent the whole day worrying bout the surprise for ruiling. hahaa. i super scared it will be screwd or somethg. although yes, its really screwd(?) HAHA. ruiling turned smarter, somehow. okay, JOKE JOKE. she is smart laa i know. but she very blur de. today she sensed we giving her a surprise. nevertheless, we had a great time (poor huiying, clearing up our mess), helpg each other do facials or somethg. poor nicholas... HAHAs. anyway, he and ruiling had a candlelit dinner hor? ;)
Thanks sijia, gerald, hewei, detian, minghui, huiying, jiaying, xiaohui and tanjin!
we went kfc for dinner after that, and laughed and joke and run bout like nobody is around us. HEE. joke of the day was by MINGHUI! it all startd when huiying and detian were sitting side by side chatting happily, then all of us thot they very compatible. meanwhile, gerald (who sat opposite detian) do the "im watching yu, dont do anythg to my girlfren" action. then we started gettg high.

we all: wah, they not happy liao, fightg over huiying, go canal fight go canal fight.
minghui: eh wait wait, detian go canal, gerald go K-E-N-N-E-L.
everyone burst into laughter with my lesbian(that dog) giving that sian diao face. YIPPEE.

wah shyt shyt shyt. tmr gort chinese test, havent study): , paper one test(wahlao who cares laa), english situ writing): (ms kwek will nag again if i don prepare and score blah blah)

anyway, advanced birthday to ruiling. 4yrs of frenship. and forever frens kay? rmbr all 8 of us DRUGS, plus gerald minghui sijia who always play arnd with us:D happy sweeeet 16, and lets go watch nc16 WAHAHAHA.

off to light my candle and burn midnight oil.

2008-07-12T21:54:00.003+08:00

saving my blog? hope so but i doubt i can.
so anw, i was telling xiaohui and jiaying just now, "im going to study today!" while their replies were "wow!? ... yaa right-.- ... study whad? study shows huh?"
and i proved them right now): okay laa, sry. i reached home and watch show till 9. i TRIED to do maths okay! i did 2 qns, then i sit in front of my com. HAHA. i shall try again ltr, maybe.

theres so much i would like to share here, right now. a lot of hilarious stuffs took place within this short period of time. i cant rmbr all at one go but theres one which made the whole class BURST into laughter, and couldnt stop laughing. i laughed till i cry i swear! its a PART II of the compre warrior joke.

ms kwek : see ah, the compre warrior thing really works for yor class, last time 0% pass, now 68%! even got 1A2 ley!
class : haha... (a little laughter nia)
ms kwek(super duper drama) : compre warriors! keep it up okay! next lesson i will tell yor who is yor compre commander.
class : huh?
ms kwek : yes! the compre commander is the one who gort A2 lor!
class : HAHAHA!

miss kwek : see, last time hu got A2 raise up yor hands.
no one. and we thought she is going to praise us for our hardwork or intelligence or somethg.
ms kwek : SEE SEE! THIS SHOWS THAT MY METHOD REALLY WORKS! (giving a VERY serious look)
everyone laughed, loudly. this is the part i cried.
ms kwek(still giving that serious look) : whads so funny?
we laughed even harder. HOHO

okay laa fine. maybe yu are not laughing now or whad, but if yu are at the scence experiencing this yorself, yu will laugh! cux its really funny. see her drama + serious actions and tone. LOL. but our improvements owe it to her? erm, maybe bah:D

this week super hardcore, cux of the sore throat, cough, flu + fever. not all at one go laa. slowly come visit me de, so still okay:D now left with a bit of cough + blocked nose. hehhs. felt so much better today compared to yesterday and thursday. thanks jiaying for her honey lemon drink and herbal tea today!HEHEHE. <3 you man. thanks huiying and xiaohui for showing much concern as well!! nag at me for eating zinger the other day LOL i didnt do much of homework/revision this week cux i rested quite alot): thus i predict next week will be even worse.

- bio/chem/physics SPA skill three.
- SS SEQ(b) test on friday):
- BIO group project tmr
- lots of hw.

zen me ban?

2008-07-05T21:28:00.004+08:00

HAHAHAs. i think no one is visiting my DEAD blog now.

im rather bz these few days. whenever i reach home, i would be too lazy to on the com blah blah. prelims is on the 22nd of aug, and i started on nothing. i needa start mugging! and i need help on physics, chem, bio and CH): cant finish liao laa rawr.
ytd was really funny, ms kwek was talking bout doing comprehension.

ms kwek: ltr for yor timed compre, imagine yor are compre warriors okay?!
class: HUH?!
ms kwek: yes, compre warriors! imagine yor are going on a battle, then evry qns are the different battles. once yu win a battle, meaning get a correct answer for the qn, yu proceed to the next stage. understand? (she said it in a damn damn drama way)
& guess whad? the whole class burst into laughter.

went for phototaking(: super fun laa! especially the casual photo. jinxue and gerald *ahem*, yunting xiaohui and me insisted on sitting on the floor, with our skirts touch the ground! MUAHAHA. i cant wait to see&buy the photo!

this morning went nlb. with huiying and xiaohui. HAHAs. 3 pple nia, cux jiaying went to see clouds, detian and hewei tuition, tanjin art. so our secret mission today faild. was thinking of tmr de, but tj got church, xiaohui that lazy pig wna sleep, so monday secret mission! hope can carry out laa. or else no time liao. HEHE. *evil&mysterious grin*

went popular, hilarious. cux huiying xiaohui and i were unglammers. just wna buy a few pens yet we took a trolley and basket. luchtime we saw 9kong. LOLs. inside joke. fine.
such a coincidence, met yongyi, peh and ashlyn at bugis. after that saw tiansheng at mrt while on my way with xiaohui for tuition.
anyway something happend during tuition which made me feel damn guilty): and damn scary. RETARDED. i was completely stunned. xiaohui, hor? but now shud be okay le.

such a boring and no zhong4 dian3 post. HAHA. nvm. blogging for the sake of it. or else huiying will start nagging again. (opppppps)

2008-06-25T22:14:00.005+08:00

stalford sucks laa): make me go down and tell me tuition cancelled when im on my way rawr.

okayyyyy, im so addicted to acting as a mad woman nowadays!(dont say im already one laa ha,ha)

many many things happend over these past few days just that im too busy to blog. okay, one is the COW- Council Of Weirdos! :D made up of tanjin detian and me. secondly the BLACKPOT. okay blackpot rawks, because we were so lucky! dummdumm~ we are so gonna go there again right, huiying, sijia, detian and hewei? we are all addicted!

we played till the arcade card no money liao.

sijia: i go top up $2, last 2 games.

hewei huiying and me: okay!

detian: oi... dont become addicted can?!

played 2 rounds, no money again.

huiying: i go top up $2, last 2 rounds

sijia, hewei and me: okay.

detian: OI! WAKE UP! dont become addicted to this game can?!

after playing the 2 rounds,

all except detian: go liao laa, dont play liao.

we picked up our bag and was about to go.

huiying was holding the card in her hands.

detian took his wallet out and pass 10bucks to huiying: go top up $5!

sijia huiying hewei and me O.O

LOLs. alot of other things, but forgort liao :P

GOOD LUCK, TANJIN JINXUE CHEEPENG MINGHUI GERALD

for chinese oral tmr! jiayou!

2008-06-19T22:25:00.002+08:00

I need to revise, study, COMPLETE MY HOMEWORK!

fine fine. thanks to my dear laopo's help, "i" managed to complete chinese website thingy! WAHAHAs. now left with:

- Chem 10yrs series 2004 - 2007
- a few maths qns
- Eng 10yrs series
- Chinese ws

i think tts all for skul hw. tuition hw? i dont intend to do liao laa rawr. HAHAHAs

im in a bad mood now, i think. because gastric(very long nvr visit me liao) visited me and im in pain now.
basically today is... a good + bad day. no elaboratns. BLEAH

2008-06-14T20:11:00.002+08:00

my laogong(s)~ BLEAHHHH. sijia, they are mine!

2008-06-11T22:07:00.003+08:00

im so tired today) : HAHA.
some emo talk before anythg else.
i finally know how much my parents have been doing for me(?) i just calculated, every month my parents will spend 1000+ bucks on my daily expenses. + the insurance and other demands of mine, they will add up to like, zomgggg. moreover, petrol prices have gone up, my dad fetch me to sch evryday and fetch me home from tuition everyday. i told him to stop fetching, but everytime 1/2 an hr before lesson end, he will call me or sms me saying he will be fetching me, and he's on e way, which meant i must be fetched home by him. RAWR. so i guess if Mdm Poon's class is rly not bad, i will transfer to her class, on a saturday, then my daddy will have no chance of picking me up! LALALA~
moreover, for this period of time, i have been in the living room watchg tv with them, and nort lock myself up. its not that the shows are especially nice, but i donwan to face my com and MSN as they remind me of emo things? LOL. but slowly, i began to like the feelg of watchg shows with my parents, chnl 8 9o'clock show. (although s'pore shows suck big time) but, it feels good to discuss the characters and the plots with yor family. it gives yu a sense of belonging. HEHHxD
take for example, this time round i scored really badly, i wantd so badly for my parents to scold me, my dad nags quite abit, scolded a weeny bit. then my mum came to me and said, "doesnt matter if yu score so badly now, if yu can score VERY WELL for yor o lvl, i would be so happy becux it shows that yu improve alot" can yu imagine how guilty i was when i heard this? ):
and even my auntie, uncle and my beloved sister have been showing great care&support for me. i used to neglect them in the past, but since i tried to keep myself occupied, i often go there and go crazy with my sis.
AND, to the one and only drugs?

Question: whad makes yixin happy?
Answer: DRUGS.

*screams* *exclaims* ZOMG. HAHAHAs.
i lost somethg, but i gained a lot more. i wonder how we drugs could make things so wonderful. meetg each other evry single day yet we love it so much. we could make new fresh jokes out of the simplest things ever. how we study and kena complaints. a lot a lot laa. gettg high all of a sudden. evryone being so unglam, throw face evrywhr we go. dancing ballet while we were walking along a pavement with ALOT OF PPLE. take pictures evrywhr we go. take VIOLENT videos even though when there are so many pple watchg. (they thought is real fight) DRUGS simply rawks.

okay. so today morning, ms wan was my alarm clock. HAHA. ytd night i was thinking "shud i wake up at 8 and go jogging?" then i kinda lazy, jiu nvr set alarm. this morning, ms wan called me at 7.59, and she was more effective than the alarm clock.

phone rings~
me: haaaloooo (very slpy)
ms wan: erm, yixin, sry ah, but did yu inform sec2s of their sana?
me: yaaaa.... (still very slpy)
ms wan: oh, now the bus is leaving, but NONE of them turn up ley!
me: HUH?! (NOT AT ALL SLEEPY)
time? 8am sharp

HEHHHEEE. damn funny. so in e end, i cant get back to sleep, i decided to go jogging. just as i was bout to leave the hse, the rain fall, whadthehell right?
was re-watching brown sugar when hewei called me to ask if we wna go his hse to play. so we agreed. in the end, detian, huiying, xiaohui, tanjin, jiang and me went! super fun. went to games room to play twister. HOHO. damn funny. sabo pple time. all the weird positions came, forfeits, dance, the house was fun to play with seriously. AHEM. jiaying&detian pair, tanjin&hewei pair, while BABY and i pair. the videos were hilarious.

went to gym, ran 3 km on trackmill, came down and realise i cant walk properly, damn funny. and i was taupok-ed. RAWR laa. by TANJIN, HEWEI and DETIAN. yes, no doubt. HAHA. okay. dont think dirty, theres a ball between us.... OPPS even worse. -,- forget it man. dont xplain liao. they taupok, but its CLEAN taupok. HAHAHA.

went tuition and was late. LOL. the "cute" guys which mdm julie always said didnt flush the toilet, so we gort jiaying's brother here to help us flush. HEHHH.

2008-06-10T22:32:00.002+08:00

i dnoe whad has gotten into me lately. i have been contradictg myself and practically, hate evryone. i have alot alot to say but doesnt matter, shant say anythg here, in case anyone feels offended or somethg-,-

homework status: piles of undone! + teeny weeny bit of merely touched.

- 10yr series ws
- chem 10yrs series papers 2004, 2005, 2006 & 2007
- physics test papers
- Bendemeer mid year Amaths paper
- Bendemeer mid year Emaths paper
- Emath probability E-learning
- Chinese ws
- Bio group work
- English compre ws
- TEN mid year/prelim chem papers from other schools
- one thick pile of selected chem questions by mr jay
- physics transformer ws
- amath integration ws

That shud be all? like... I feel like fainting/crying laa.
Thursday is the big day! BBT! YAYYE! But, kinda feel sad i needa leave early, such a disappointment, sijia vanessa xueli! HELP ME OKAY? LALALA~!

2008-06-07T21:30:00.009+08:00

rah rah rahhhhhh! im so tired yet bored but i don wna sleep so early.

this week is not really monotonous, just that nothg goes according to plan):

today went airport to study(?). erm fine. we ended up NOT studyg. met at 10.15, went airport by train. went to T3 and took skytrain to T1. we acted like idiots on the train. had a bit of camwhoring at the emo place in T1, HAHA. so fun(!) walked around T1, then realise there is no proper place to study. RAWR. took skytrain to T2 in e end. camwhore at the telephone booth again. DRUGS ley, whad yu expect huh? drugs love camwhoring laa.

settled down at mac, ate lunch because its 12noon. HAHA. drugs are the pro!

sweetie pie was so cold, so he wore my jacket and baby's. pink + white. super nice:D next time shall post the pic(if i ever rmbr)

evidence to show that we, erm "study"

tanjin playing~

BLEAH. we are pro laa:D LOVE DRUGS

2008-06-06T15:31:00.002+08:00

in LT1, watch performances.
tong shou tong jiao, the first time i heard on tv i found it very touchg and i cried. i kept listening to it and turn numb le. wont cry lur. that time i went kbox with huiying and jiaying i sang it, i was laughing. (hy and jy knows the reason) this time round, i cried like nobody's business... they tried playing the song, i listend to the startg then i cried.
del and yt are like saying: wahlao, yixin, havent even start ley!
my reply was: the lyrics are flashing inside my mind liao..
HAHA. it sounds so stupid now.
thanks sec2s!

还记得小小年纪
松开我的手迷失的你
在人群里看见你
一边哭泣手还握着冰淇淋

有时候难过生气
你总有办法逗我开心
依然清晰回忆里
那些曾经有笑有泪的光阴

我们的生命先后顺序
在同个温室里
也是存在在这个世界
唯一的唯一

未来的每一步一脚印
踏着彼此梦想前进
路上偶尔风吹雨淋
也要握紧你的手心

未来的每一步一脚印
相知相惜相依为命
别忘记之间的约定
我会永远在你身边陪着你

现在我唱的这首歌曲
给我最亲爱的弟弟
在我未来生命之旅
要和你同手同脚同走下去

look at the words highlighted in green, exactly whad i wna tell my cadets. i dnoe how yu guys felt when yu sang this song but i just want you guys to know that, yes, we pass out lur. BUT, i regarded yor like my little children, each and evryone of yor here.

i rmbred before annual camp, we have to choose the top 3 positions we want during NCO life. i put their sqd as the 1st choice(: because i want to influence this sqd, like how donglin they all motivate us(:
but, i kinda regret during the investiture, when i saw them playing and dropping beret onto the floor. LOL. (they were still young children back then.)
so posting results: SEC 2 SQD.

hewei, yunting, del and me walked towards them. they greetd us with looks like : "eee, they are our NCOs, i donwan" i was like...T.T (HAHA)

off to the concourse we went~ the NCOs keep coming to me:"yixin, can yu go control yor sqd? they started eating le ley!"
and caught cadet walking in the open without beret on that very same day.
its quite demoralising for the 4 of us? cux our job is to take them for a year, teach them and make shure they are up to standard.
that very night, at arnd 8pm, we were still in school. Had a tok with wenjie, estelle, jian an, lucas and jacklyn. (sec2s, do all these names ring a bell?) yup, they were telling us bout the problems.

wenjie: actually this sqd okay de laa, nort much problems
the 4 of us smiled, and nodded.
wenjie: just that no initiative, gort once pump very long, oso no timer.
estelle: yaa, somemore, once they late for very long
jian an: yaa! and sometimes, their attendance nort good de, some very fond of ponning.
lucas: and, their drills, nort rly very good. a lot no ninety, swing arms.
blah blah blah... blah...
the 4 of us: huh... like that basically evrythg oso gort prob lor...

that night, went home and realise their blogs have been updated. my feelg back then? i cant really describe. quite touched yet quite troubled, i dnow how to approach them the next activity.nvr been an NCO before. nvr take cadets before. nvr teach cadets before. nvr have cadets that i say :"this is my sqd, these are my cadets" kinda afraid i might harm them instead of help them.

1st activity, only sec2 sqd!:D they proved us wrong with the standard of their drills. they put in effort(: initiative, its there actually. a few keep volunteering.yup, but needa be fierce(?) HEHHxD
although they made a no. of mistakes, they showd us they are good.

slowly, i witnessd how this sqd grows. from little monkeys till... BIG monkeys, haha. monkeys who are bonding RATHER well(needa jiayou more~~!) HEHHHs.

Monkeys who nvr fail to surprise me with high standards of drills? HAHA. AT TIMES LAA! BLEAH.
Monkeys who always surprise me with great performances!:D
Monkeys who can bring laughter, yet can learn well.
Monkeys who are determind to score well.
Monkeys who are so nice!

sec2s, CLs to be, Most Senior Sqd, whadevr challenges yor might face in future, feel free to approach me(: i will try my best to help yor. i hope yor will bond as one, all 18 of yor. nort leaving anyone behind. yor are ONE SQUAD. i want to see all 18 of yor, rly rly united and strong. Endure yor sec3 life, and Cadet Leader life. Encourage each other to go on, dont give up no matter how tough the road is. Anythg difficult can be solved as long as all 18 of yor are there.
AND AND, more bondg sessions hor?
NETBALL~! HEHHHHxD

JIAYOU SEC2s

2008-06-01T15:02:00.006+08:00

my sec1 cadet life.
the 1st activity, gosh. i rmbrd i went with ruiling and huiying. gort to know hewei cux he's our sqd de timer. HAHA. and our NCOs-yensen, gordon, xuejun and liyi. we went to the geog room to have introduction session and "rules and regulatns" debrief. thats when evrythg was so disastrous. the sec1RP guys were basically making a fool out of themselves:X
all of their speech were like... "I am ___, from 1RP the last class"
moreover, gordon was giving the talk on rules and regulatns halfway, xuejun took over. someone from 1RP raised up his hand: "xuejun nco, we dont like yu to give the talk, we prefer him(points to gordon)"
then yu can see gordon xuejun giving that "dont know how to handle these nuaghty monkeys" look.
thats when i think, ewwww, there are my sqdmates? all so, lame de...but doesnt matter, since this is only CCA, which requires no effort.
HEY, no effort doesnt mean that i nvr do anythg or whad laa. i just keep quiet and do drills, and i nvr pon okay! HEHHHxD
always doing sedia, senang diri, trying sososo hard to get a solid bang, JUST TO get a 5mins break.
but as the 1/2 year goes by, these 4 NCOs rly did a good job. after campfire whr we had heart-to-heart talk, a no. of us cried. Here we have gort our PATIENT NCOs.

sec2 life
we gort to know, our NCOs were Aijia, Donglin, Eileen and Melvin.
yes. at 1st we thought they were not as nice as our 1st batch of NCOs. the 1st batch wont scold us, they just guide us patiently. no matter how we used to ABC them, they seemd to forgive&forget. this batch, they taught us through the hard way. thats when we realised, NPCC wasnt bout playing, its bout discipline, bout teamwork.how we shud work tgt. we have to chiong syllabus, cux so many tests coming up. trying hard to get solid bangs from ALL THE DRILLS we learnt, nort becux we want the 5 mins break, but becux we need more marks for the tests.
the sec2 life, where hard skills were focused. nevertheless, our NCOs did a GREAT job, by polishing our hard skills till they were up to standard and nort forgetting, bonding our sqd, teach us all bout discipline and PICARDS. where our sqd is on the way to its bonding.
aijia gave us the name: NCO-to-be-sqd-to-be-sqd.
we met so many problems along the way, but, we still made it to the end, isnt it?

sec3 cadet life - before we took over.
PAMELA, ZHONG ZI, VINCENT, MARVIN.
i dnoe how it started, with ALL OF US meetg evryday after school and walk out of school to our favourite hangout place tgt - the lucky bread.
NCO-to-be sqd. thus a lot of things have to be handled by us, major projects blah blah. but they were like peas to us. becux we stood strong.
pamela nco is like a joke? HAHA. nevertheless she is a good role model. marvin nco is always with us during activity. like a mother.(: vincent nco was such a good role model, just like a dad. when he pei us to the dnoe whad course=X, the officer there said his boots damn shiny. so funny laa. he like so shy like that. zhongzi was like another mother. always standing behind us, quietly observing us. then when he talk and laugh, he sound like a... witch. HAHA. but he always ask us to go sleep when we are online late at night. nagnag like mother like that.
i always thought, these 4 NCOs were the good combi:D thankyou!
i rmbrd before we took over, there are again, so much conflicts. because of, biasness. zhongzi and marvin were trying so hard to solve it. evrytime during activity they were the quiet ones, but they were the most eager to help our sqd(:
i rmbrd a joke by vincent nco..HOHO
we were doing baton drill, command is sedia from hormat, timing 1-check-1.

vincent: sqd sedia!
timer: 1!
zhongzi: timing is 1 meh?
vincent: timer say 1 then is 1 laa!(damn sacarstic)
we laughed.
after a while,
vincent: sqd sedia!
timer: 1!
vincent and zhongzi burst into laughter.

here we drilled. trying hard to get solid bangs, nort becux of breaks, nort becux of marks, but becux we really want it, from the bottom of our hearts.
we were handed over to officers for NCO training course. RAWR. but our sqd was great. we were so determined to bring the unit to greater heights.
then gerald, tanjin, cheepeng and me gort lame convo evry nights, whad we wna do as NCOs when take over the unit. gerald wna buy vending machine, tanjin wna build soccer court in log room. and me, i just laugh at their lame convo.
all 22 of us said, no matter whad posts we were given, we wont have anymore conflicts. we will do our duties well, with pride. with this attitude, we went for NCO training camp and Annual camp. the 4day3night camp. on the 1st day, we were told to plan for POP. yes. but there are conflicts even on deciding who to be the parade commander from our sqd during POP for 43rd batch of NCOs. from then, i knew, i have to be prepared for the worst. i suddenly lost confidence in this sqd. the bondg and evrythg.
the night before we had the nightwalk. we playd 4 games. teaching us teamwork and evrythg. even to extinguish the fire with perspiratns. even to support 2 spars.we did all sorts of silly things just to extinguish the 22 candles. but we were so happy back then. the confidence for our sqd came back again.

my life as an NCO
praying that POP will go on smoothly. we took over. we gort our posting results. they were so shocking huh? 1st few activities were still alright. but, the sqd started to get further and further away. no one wants to attend meetg even when we are planning for major events.
in the past, as cadets we did evrythg tgt. whenever we want to tok to any of our sqdmates, they are just beside us. but as NCOs, yu often hear yor own sqdmates asking:" hey, did yu see ruiling?" "hey, did yu see shirong?" blah blah.
worse still, we dont even know whether our own sqdmates are present anort even when the activity started.
this reminds me of a joke of sijia and junyi sir...

junyi sir: sijia, whads yor sqd strength today?
sijia: oh, 19
junyi sir: who is nort present?
sijia: erm, vanessa, minghui and one more... err...errr...
junyi sir: and who?
sijia: erm, yu know, i forgort his name... that one lor, aiyo, i suddenly forget his name, i rmbr his face... aiya, whads his name ahh?
the truth is, sijia dnoe who is nort present.... she is acting? HAHA. nice one sijia!
just then, shirong walked past...
sijia: hey shirong! who is nort present today ah?
shirong: erm, ruiling lor.
sijia: ohyaa! junyi sir, ruiling nort present!
LAUGH OUT LOUD.

we distanced, only a few girls and guys came back, purely cux of frenship, no longer the passion.
the rest gave up halfway. doesnt matter anymore for now... we passed out, having the most happy POP ever. LAUGHTERS WERE ALL OVER. NO REGRETS:D
BUT, we are NCOs forever, becux the next batch are the CLs:D

thanks to the 21 of my sqdmates out there.
thanks to the 7 drugs who were always by my side when i need yor. cheering me up when im facing the bleakest moments of my life.
thanks to the campcraft team, who really made my NCO life fruitful and make me feel that we still stood strong!
thanks to sec2s who made my NCO life a worthwhile one. without yor, i might be the one who gave up as well.
thanks to testg dept which made me love paperwork!
thanks to all my exNCOs and officers!

2008-05-27T18:54:00.006+08:00

today is a year after a significant day for me. last year's today was a terrible day which made me a happy girl.(weird i know) thinking of whad happend exactly a year ago actually made me so sad now. i felt like crying but i just cant do it. the feelgs in my heart made me feel so terrible yet i dnoe how to let all the feelgs out. ohfuck. im feelg so tired now.
i rmbrd how yu comfortd me.
how we chatted thru the night bout anythg and evrythg.
how serious yu actually took my joke as and went to pp early the next day.
how nice yu were to actually know that im tired after one sleepless night.
how yu waitd there for me when i have to pack and rush down.
and alot alot more.
thanks.

2008-05-23T23:53:00.004+08:00

whad a monotonous week) : worse still, my report card exacerbate my life RAWR\

yaayaa, for this whole week a lotta pple have been approaching me and ask me bout whad happened to me, how come my results drop like... blah blah. my results rly seemd so astounding to all of yor mah? :\ nevertheless, im still able to keep myself high, still as vivacious as ever:D

chionging tuition these 3 days. but its really fun. never in my life had i look forward to tuitions so much!:D

today's physics and chem tuition by mr jay was damn fun. he is a VERY VERY NICE teacher:D
he keep joking but he dont laugh. he give a very cool face, and the whole class will laugh. i couldnt help but burst into loud laughter. OPPS :\
mr jay was a nice teacher afterall. i understand whad he's teaching, at least (:

ohyaa. videos are the in thing for now. especially hewei's bimbo video which i took. evryone has grown addicted to it. especially my baby and jiaying. they watched it all the time yet they wont grow sick of it=.=

haizzz. i guess im gonna lock up my blog one of these days.

2008-05-17T14:52:00.005+08:00

爱错了吗
by 陈诗莉

才一天寂寞就搬进我住的房间
原来爱上你没有休息时间
深夜不打烊的商店我是最孤单的店员
限时热卖的商品是原谅
一眨眼我穿过没有你在的夏天
也听说你有别人在身边
第一次我尝到失恋第一次做到不埋怨
但是做不到的眼泪什么都看不见
我爱错了吗你也算了吧
做我的右手你都忘了吧
我所有的缺点难道不能吞下
童话没有把结局留下掉进眼里的沙
我爱错了吗

yesterday was.... splendid! handover was rather sad for us) : no more nco office. its like the whole lot of us were being retrenched, then sit in front of lam yarn ma'am, she will name out all the depts, then respectivite heads handover all their possesions to her. AWWW D :

nvmnvm, after that DRUGS - xiaohui - ruiling + sijia + gerald went to have LOADS OF FUN! :D
we went ice cream chef which was really great! and walked to the playground at sijia's hse. i was practically mad, full of zeal. playing with the dipsy!:D so fun. the others were playing along with me and we threw our faces away lur..

we took a video of a kidnapping scene with casts:

director/photographer - huiying
kidnappers - tanjin and gerald
victim - detian
victim's mother - me
policemen - hewei and jiaying.

damn funny. perhaps we shud upload the videos on youtube lo. camwhore too! i shall upload the pics next time:D very very unglam pictures, especially me. BLEAHx.
after that rush to bedok for physics tuition with honey jiaying. sorry laopo huiying i pangseh yu) :
mr jay liew was really fierce laa! so unlike 2 other tuition teachers of ours. HAHA. but he the way he teach is great, answers are detailed too. he teached really fast because he was doing revision, nort bad oso, can train alertness:D

2008-05-13T20:33:00.002+08:00

my life is soooo.... screwd.
CONFIRM fail 4 subjects lur. (including BIO) felt like crying when i gort my SS back. the teacher which i don wna disappoint are mrs kee, ms kwek and ms gan. and i failed these 3 subjects - chem, eng and combined humanities. felt so terrible, esp when i gort back my ss and english. pray that i pass my physics, amath. passing egeog and bio seemed so impossible, like whadevr lo.

after skul today went bugis, ahahas. jiaying and me damn malu at the bus stop. we were holding onto each other in front of the bus entrance, pondering whether to board it or not. the bus driver was waiting and jiaying and i were like "want go or not? want go or not?... ..." and my dear baby just laughs and walk away. BABY SO naughty~! *vomits*(?) HAHAs. about to go home then saw nicole& her fren there. HAHA. our convo is super funny laa. nicole damn cuteeeeee!
went back home and slack( : then asked huiying to pei me to playground, tok&tok, THANKS XIONGLAOPO! LOVE YOU LAA! toking to her really makes me fail good. sry i made yu miss yor show, which is casting my laogong i know=X hoho.

tmr, amath physics and egeog.

it doesnt matter if yu dropped to the bottom, because it means that yu can improve and rise to the top. if yu are at the top, either yu maintain or drop. so its better to be the last!:D:D BLEAH!

2008-05-10T17:21:00.002+08:00

ytd was a great day.

i slept at 4am the day before and woke up at 7am! HAHAHAs. then watch 溏心风暴:D:D:D
i left house for leisure park just to cut hair. the hairstylist is super cool (the one who salvaged detian's hair w/out sideburns the other time. HOHO). &he is super funny laa. after which, i RUSH to suntec to find honey and xionglaopo + BABY and 45yrold partner. awwwwww. i ran from city hall mrt to suntec like a mad woman, and nearly fell down twice on the escalator) :

reached there on time( : k student rawks, with xiaohui's membership card! $14.50 nia, with 5hrs of singing session, refillable drinks + a plate of delicious mushroom balls/nuggets/fries + snacks. HAHAHA. damn cool. we sing till we going to fall aslp lur. but worth it. jiaying left at 6.30. so left me and huiying. i was trying out a different style, and i think i can be a great MAN. lalala~
love kbox with honey and xiong laopo. we are so great! &with sijia popping by and create chaos in our room, and baby walking in toktoktoktoktok then walk off. HAHAHAs.

okay, off to watch shows again~ and tonight's mothers day dinner!:D:D yippeeee!

and omg, XIAOHUI BABY, how did yu break my msn pm code? AWWWW.

2008-05-08T22:27:00.002+08:00

exams are overrrrrrrrr! i need a BREAK. :D:D:D

yay. no more of that dnoe whad english tuition cux i signed up another with jiaying! mdm julie! WAHAHAHAs. physics + chem which cost $400+, i think im nort going for that one) :

OTHER MATTERS TROUBLING ME AGAIN!
- proposalS (hahahaha, detian is doomed for THESE too)
- letters for sec2s

hopefully i can get out of this boring house tmr! byebye!

2008-04-10T22:59:00.005+08:00

and im here, blogging. wahahahaa.

im totally drained out i dnoe why. when i actually have alot of rests, i think + halfdays. hehh. tmr is chinese bio and maths. omgomgomg. im so dead. because theres lots of hw to be handed in, butbutbut... ... ...
whadever laa! ) :

today so... fun! before and during tuition. sweetie pie tanjin and i were sitting at the back of the 7 sitters car. the 2 seats right at the back were super cramp. then jiaying's mum drove past a hump. tanjin and me literally HOPPED up and our heads nearly hit the ceiling of the car. i sreamed. LOL. after that, tj and i were like idiots holding on to our heads L.O.L ha.ha.

during tuition, i was looking at the board, felt totally hopeless + useless, both hand clasping onto my head, like its going to explode anytime. facial expression: im dying~
teacher: yor want to go poly or jc?
the class: poly poly~
me(still giving a dying look): chua chu kang cemetry...
jiaying burst into laughter. HEHH.

LALALA. tmr morning needa go see VP. too hardworking, no choice. all thanks to my honey cheng black black can!

i have a life. busy life. gort english tuition on tuesday, chinese tuition on wednesday, amath tuition on thursday. mummy says she's gettg bio and physics tuition for me. and oso one teacher who specially comes to my hse for amaths + emaths. on top of that, i missed english tuition the day before, make up is tmr night. BOO!

2008-04-09T20:46:00.003+08:00

LALALA~

im super tired. havent recover from camping sleeping disorder. i slept at 8 yesterday after eating and bathing. woke up at 10 and stare at my dad(sry i rly dnoe whad im doing) then went to wash up and back to sleep again. set THREE alarms at 2am, 2.30am and 2.45 am to study for chinese test. i woke up at 2 and shut down all 3 of my alarms cux im too tired. then went back to sleep till 6 this morning~ tadaa~ 10hrs of sleep.
in skul is also sleeping during english lesson since its like so slack. i try to catch naps evry now and then when possible but doesnt seemd to help) :

napfa today and yes, im gonna re-run. today i stop cux of my nose... =.= or else could have ran faster, so yes, run again~

tomorrow and friday is halfdays because of bazaar preparation. saturday is bazaar is my auntie + uncle + sister + sister-in-law are coming! YAY. sunday is study group with drugs again~ tadaa~

-amath hw
-english tuition hw
-chinese sap ws
-chinese compo
-chem ws on alkanes&alkenes
-bio practicals skill 3 ws (3 sets to be done)
-chem skill 3 ws
-chinese online quiz
-english vocab book(owe kwek 6 weeks de in total)

omg. just kill me.

2008-04-07T21:28:00.001+08:00

Y Imagine me without you - Jaci Velasquez

As long as stars shine down from heaven
And the rivers run into the sea
Til the end of time forever
You're the only love I'll need

In my life you're all that matters
In my eyes the only truth I see
When my hopes and dreams have shattered
You're the one that's there for me

When I found you I was blessed
And I will never leave you, I need you

Chorus:
Imagine me without you
I'd be lost and so confused
I wouldn't last a day, I'd be afraid
Without you there to see me through

Imagine me without you
Lord, you know it's just impossible
Because of you, it's all brand new
My life is now worthwhile
I can't imagine me without you

When you caught me I was falling
You're love lifted me back on my feet
It was like you heard me calling
And you rush to set me free

When I found you I was blessed
And I will never leave you, I need you

Chorus

When I found you I was blessed
And I will never leave you, I need you oh

Chorus

I can't imagine me without you

2008-04-06T17:22:00.002+08:00

awwwww. back from camp. 3d2n camp, which i have less than 4hrs of sleep throughout the whole thing! first night i was with tanjin doing sentry, listen to his craps with group6, like HAHA. and i gort a cute HL milk box! woolala. ytd night was nightwalk laa. i was super worried, and a lot of things really happend. LOTS OF HICCUPS. i sat at the new hall, thinking that i might be doomed during evaluatn which will take super long. felt like cancelg the whole night walk. luckily guohui sir encouraged me as well as the other fellow NCOs who tried to made it a success!:D

camp as an NCO is even more tiring) : as in, you have to do a lot of things, and really think&do ahead. camp as a cadet is torturous(?) but the bonding btwn yor grp is a great thing to have!

nothing much i want to mention. back home i keep thinking of one thing - sec2s. pple often have camp sick after a camp, but because i was really touched by the skit at campfire ytd, i kept thinking of it. then it brings me back to the memories with sec2s. most of which i think is really random. fun+scoldgs+zi-high.... im loss for words. too happy and guilty. they can no longer listen to me... i cant teach them new drills anymore. i cant be at the back of the sqd with hewei yunting and delvis praising them for their good drills, in order nort to let them see us being SO DAMN HAPPY. must at least let them think they havent do till the best and exceed limit mah. evil laa, but hope it works:D i can no longer be in front of them during debriefs and hewei and yunting will tok tok tok and when its me turn i will say "i forgort whad i want to say". about a few weeks till official POP.

tmr shall post more bout the camp..(?)

2008-04-01T20:05:00.003+08:00

how unfair the world can actually get. when 2 pple go on their own ways, they live different lives. one lives happily ever after, while the other one just fake happiness ever after. cant everyone be happy in this world? cant everyone live in the same life, get the same results for evrythg?

when the word trust is actually so difficult to comprehend. think a couple of months back, a pack of lies actually foold me like nobody's business. the promises and evrythg, i will nvr believe them again.

i nvr fall asleep in lessons nowadays lur~ yayy! and i pay 75% in class lur, compared to last time. april fools day. LOL. last year to fool teachers(?) its funny to see how the teachers react. 4hm anf 4gr had a swop, but didnt really fool mr faizal. i wantd to see his reaction de) :

back in 4ly, we played with ms kwek. duper cute.

ms kwek was reading a passage halfway...
jingshen: (shouts) happy april fool's day!
ms kwek: (taken aback and look at the passage she holding) where? where?
jingshen: teacher! yu walk into the wrong class.
ms kwek: really meh? (looks out of the class)
class: april fool april fool!
ms kwek look at us with a diao face: ohyaa, lucky no one tried to trick me today.

dnoe she act blur or shud i describe her as innocent? O.O

12.15's lesson, mrs kee! thats whr the fun come~ we changed the time on the clock to 1.15 then pack up and act as if we going. mrs kee came into class.

edward: omg, mrs kee, how come yu so late? we are about to go you know..
mrs kee: huh?
edward: you are 1hr late!
mrs kee gave a suspicious look then ponder a while: dont bluff me laa..
apparently, 4ly continues to act.
mrs kee: class stand, good afternoon class.
class: thank you mrs kee!
mrs kee: nono, good afternoon class.
class: thank you mrs kee.
mrs kee laughs and sajiao like a kid: aiyaaaaa, good afternoon class!
class look at each other: good afternoon mrs kee (keeps laughing~)

mrs kee: okay, yor settle down, read thru yor notes, i going to give yor a short quiz.
class: aiya, mrs kee, dont trick us laa, april fool joke right?
mrs kee(laughs): really gort quiz!
class: mrs kee, dont joke already
mrs kee: no laa, i nort as lame as yor...
the class laughs:D

there is a problem with our screen projector. there is a shadow for evry single character on it.

mrs kee: eh 4ly, yor need to go to mr gerald and tell him yor class projector gort problem ley, see, gort double ley.
class: huh?
mrs kee: yor can see clearly anort?
casey: gort shadow meh? dont have whad... (the fact is we cant really see clearly)
mrs kee: dont have meh?
class: omg teacher whad did you see?
mrs kee gives a suspicious look and laugh: fine laa fine laa, dont argue with yor. yor say can see then can see lor....
4LY: =.=

after that mrs kee kept smiling and laughing all e way. chin kiat and bryan spotted it and ask her why she so high today. then she replied, still wearing a smile:"dnoe ley, just now trick by yor, i very happy mah"
LOL.
the bell goes. & now its really 1.15pm.

mrs kee: wait wait, i finish this 1st.
class: no.....
mrs kee: nvm whad, yor no lesson now right?
class: have... (really have)
mrs kee: april fool joke ah?
class: no... really have. ms gan's lesson
mrs kee: yaayaa, ms gan ley ms gan ley?

apparenly she dont believe us, so funny. but nvm.

after skul we went out tgt. calld ruiling's gor to prank him. using my phone + my voice.
the other party picked up the phone, i start off with "Hey bitch" with that bimbo voice~ HAHA. then they all laugh. the convo with them is super funny.
then on the way home called huiying's brother. super innocent - thats all i can comment( :

anyway, monday's interaction period was funny too. cux before that i met up with hewei and use the bimbo lang~ so i went back class to use the bimbo lang on xinyi and jingshen.

me: hey bitch (point at jingshen)
jingshen: (look around him and look at the teacher) teacher she scold me!
ms kwek: whad did she scold yu?
evryone was laughing like hell.
jingshen: ermmm... nothing.
ms kwek: she scold yu is for yor own good yu know!

FUNNY:D:D:D im leading a happy life, on the outside at times

2008-03-28T21:00:00.002+08:00

no school actually sucks so much) : WOW.

i find myself missing school&lessons. perhaps its the 41pple(+ teacher) that make my life wonderful now. and oso ruiling huiying jiaying xiaohui after skul~ awwwww.

wanted to study alot alot today, but ended up shopping alot alot today. at popular. with xiaohui and ruiling:D i love to look at assessment books, cux i will feel motivated to do them, when they still doesnt belong to me yet. pay for it, and it will rot on my shelf/table/either one corner of my hse=X
study group is gettg more sian, definitely not the pple cux we still keep laughing, but just dont feel like studying) :
nevertheless, i gort alot of stickers today! thanks ahma and mummy, my motivators of the day~ LALALA.

lunch today was lame, because we scammed alot of shops *ahem* and we just exercised with an empty tummy) : long john in the end, service was poor like shyt, but still, detian rang the bell=.=

tmr ccc hopefully it will not be postponed! then will find my sis at dnoe whr to study, but normally we just end up crappg here and there blah blah. but who cares( :

2008-03-27T22:44:00.003+08:00

MAGIC! is the word.

im so tired. after days of facing books non-stop, including sats and suns cux of study grp with drugs~ physics SAP is totally of no use to me cux i dont get a single idea whad the teacher is trying to say. and mummy and me were ranting bout how disgusting the teacher's voice can get. poor mummy, i asked her to sit btwn me and ahma, ahma drew her hand like siao~ luckily mama's lips nvr turn purple) :

i came across this sentence on someone's blog "because yu are sad in the past, tts why yu get this kinda results. now that yu are happy, yu shud be startg to work hard and get good results" does that mean that i can nvr get good results?
im now forcing myself to do somethg i hate. im always reluctant to do it, the thought of it just makes me feel, disgustg. yet pple say its the fastest and best way to forget someone, and im trying. i felt like crying, to get myself in such a mess. i thot bout it today, i might nvr stand up. even i, felt utterly disgusted by myself.
yes, found yorself. the way yu want yor life to be. for the few months, im always the hindrance. im so sry. had i known it earlier, i would have made myself vanish. to think that im actually so silly, i cant even pick myself up. worse, i gort myself into a deeper shyt. i have no more energy to hang on. so exhausted, i just wish to close my eyes, and nvr to open them again.

once again, 4LY nvr failed to make my day. in class, i felt really happy. thanks! especially to jiaying, ruiling, huiying~ being by my side at all times( : cux of the things that happend, i might have lost patience, rly rly sry.
might have lost the "zi-high"ness in me lur, or maybe nort, since im MWS:D:D:D i will always be that kay?

2008-03-24T19:51:00.004+08:00

i felt terrible today after school) : insensitive reminders.

but lesson was still as fun, with 4loyalty arnd( : super fun. esp during chinese lesson. we clapped throughout, then edwards turn, evryone stop clapping. COOL HUH? hehhhxD jianfeng deserves a pat on his back, for being able to explain chinese using differentiatn. LOL. damn cool( : gort my progress report. horrible. RAWR.

going to have pasar malam lur~ random sry.

hwkhwk~

chinese compo
english essay correctns
reading responses (alot alot, hehhxD)
physics wb
chem ws
amath SAP ws
vocab notebook

jiayou!~ XIAOHUI MOTIVATOR~ i need yor motivatn baby.

2008-03-23T21:45:00.002+08:00

i thot i would be strong, but when some things just appeared in front of me, i just could not control myself. but at least i feel better now, compared to last time, i think. thanks to all who have been there for me( :

friday. went out in the morning to tm. i forgort whad we have done there though. ha,ha. after evrythg went to expo. its all the way at hall1. ~~tmd~~ far can. OPPPPS. haha. but its worth it. the drama was nice! iMing. really very nice. but gary said the one at jurong west nicer. very funny. ours is emo. i cried laa, the part where the person was tortured and whipped) : i wanted to watch the one at jw!!! but didnt go) :

ytd's ccc was postponed, again. to 29th march! yayyyye! im going to miss HRC! wahahaha. oppps, sry. nort irresponsible but im really really afraid of height laa=.= the few of them will know. that time we went to the playground, then we climb up, my legs were trembling. mind yu, its a playground for kids, and im scared) :

let the cadets take tkgs bus, we then went to jurong point to eat. macs. i sent xiaohui jiaying huiying and hewei off to the mrt then went back and walk arnd again while waitg for my uncle to fetch me to my aunt's hse! wheee! it has been so long since i last went there. talked to my sister for the whole night bout NP stuffs and studies and random. LOL. mostly is NP, my sister taught me how to scold cadets. however they are off no use to me now. LOL. maybe during camp, yu can see me torturing the cadets. bleah. on top of that, she gave me an evil idea for night walk. LALALA~ so cool sia:D

this morning woke up late. rushed down to bugis from jurong. haha. and im nort late( : study. today nort motivator, feel very relaxed. the thing is, motivator cannort slack, and must act angry and fierce. today no need le~ and i gort lots of stickers thanks mummy!
halfway through pei "daddy" go buy jacket. he cant seemd to pronounce the word correctly though. hehhxD he gort a really great deal laa. walked round the whole of bugis. $69, $59, blah blah. all super ex de. then IP zone gort one quite nice, the price tag says $33. the apparently daddy bought it. he paid 33bucks then the person gave him 10bucks and said it cost 23 nia. we both stunned. haha. daddy is happy( :

didnt study much today) : and did one hw out of dozens im so deadT.T tmr go skul then chiong=X cux my brain stopped working for now.

and yay, tmr going to simei to get a new charger, cux mine spoilt. hopefully anyang can go. hehh. i can then pay yu back yor ice cream!:D

2008-03-21T01:17:00.005+08:00

having a conference, tj and rl. they toking bout super random stuffs which i cant blend in, so i shall blog! ( :

i should be happy, cause yu are happy. there is a saying that is comforting me this way.
yes, so i should be happy. i should be happy. i should be happy. please?

today's lesson was okay. bio was funny cux we started reproductn in humans and the class guys were gettg way horny. LOL. ms lam damn funny oso laa!

ms lam: okay, this is called testis, layman using a more formal term called it testicle. so whad is the more crude term?
a few of the guys: balls.
ms lam(nodded and give diao face): yes, balls.
the whole class burst into laughter:D

ms lam: sperms will be released. a sperm doesnt come out alone. whad does it come out with?
jingshen: other sperms (p.s answer is supposed to be some kind of fluid)
ms lam: hahahaha... (laugh in a cute&funny way)
we all laughed too:D

ms lam: sperms doesnt survive under hot temperatures. so the guys wearing jeans, how?
jingshen: unzip the pants.
ms lam: no...
vanessa: put ice
miss lam: hahahaha... (laugh in a cute&funny way, again)
we laughed again:D

the whole class is... *ahem*

ms kwek's lesson is... i think fortune telling session. today has gort the vocab test, where she will call pple to answer qns blah blah. evry week shure call me de. wth=.= then today chin kiat nicole jingshen and me were like guessing who she will call. she called me, evryone laughed=.= i dnoe how to answer, nicole hinted, and i passed! ( :

this weekend is like, mountains and hills of hw, and im going to complete them!( : although there is no time, cux tmr is outing with my drugs family. hehh. nonono, no study grp tmr. time to relax~ saturday competitn and sunday, MUGGING time with drugs family. so meaning, im facing the same pple evryday yet im nort at all bored of their faces! in fact, i hope to mug with them more! motivatn! this week's motivator: jiaying and huiying cux they've gort stickers!:D yayyyye!

2008-03-19T21:14:00.003+08:00

guilt or no guilt, nvm. i will just do these, i believe yu will be extremely elated.

i guess at the very least i gort the rest, maybe. whadevr but i think class is helping me to forget, my "family" is helping me to forget. trying occupying myself with a lot of things is helping me to forget. keeping myself high laughing and keep up with my MWS(WF) is helping me to forget.

class is gettg really fun. 4LY! hehhh. ytd chem lesson, mrs kee is so cute laa. rly <3 her man! hehhhh. teaching really good too( : she made the whole of 4LY really HIGH. LOL. she kept emphasising we cannort laugh cux we are bio students? hehh. but the guys were like.....*ahem*
today's charisma we were like playing with ms ang. duper cute:D we lied to her. but real funny. bad children, hehhhs.

and i <3 playing stress with black mama! whee! can make me damn damn damn high.

2008-03-17T20:11:00.003+08:00

schooling is terrible. im so tired, mentally&physically.
and omg detian just reminded me i really gort addicted to my drugs. no motivatn to study w/out them now) : lol. alot alot alot alot of hw piled and left undone.
campcraft competition this saturday, wednesday training = skip SAP. yucks.

i havent stand, but i tried crawling. at least.

2008-03-14T22:42:00.002+08:00

tmr i will be on drugs again. yes, drugs, dont be that surprised.
drugs = jiaying + huiying + ruiling + xiaohui + tanjin + detian + hewei
our study group tmr! ( :

they made my day happy and forget evrythg, but yet when evrythg ends, its the word emo again. but they rly helpd me alort. thanks.
still gort a number of pple, but next time bahh.

sometimes i just force a smile, wonder if it rly helps.

2008-03-11T21:13:00.002+08:00

歌曲: 最近还好吗
作词: 陈震施人诚
作曲: 郑楠挑
演唱: S.H.E

一张耶诞卡写上满满祝福的话
地址写的是心底你能不能收到它
天有点冷风有点大城市宁静而喧哗
这一个冬天我得一个人走回家

问自己习惯了吗
没有你每到夜里回声变得好大
有没有什么好方法
让寂寞变听话
你最近还好吗
是不是也在思念里挣扎
你说会记得我还记得吗
你最近还好吗
忙碌吗累吗心还会痛吗
如果真不得已忘了我快向
快乐出发

有再多的牵挂都已没有权利表达 (没有权利表达)
旧情人给的问候比陌生人还尴尬 (都还尴尬)
昨天远了明天还长回忆模糊但巨大
这样的深夜眼泪要怎样不流下

2008-03-07T00:07:00.003+08:00

i believe somethg, im out of yor world, completely.
now mention yixin, i bet yu don even know who she is.

whenever i think of yu and shed a tear, i would ask myself, how bout the other end? are yu heartbroken as well? & i would smile, not that i got the perfect answer but just smiling at how silly i can get. then tell myself, "yixin, who are yu to care? yu are of no position. he don give a damn." it takes lots of effort telling yorself this cux yu are holdg back yor tears.
i made up 1001 reasons for myself to hate yu, hoping that i might just forget yu. it didnt work.

i know nothing bout me can affect yu now. yu are back to yor life, as per normal. they told me, its nort worth it. they told me, i have to stand up. they told me, i have to be stronger than yu. i guess thats all impossible. cux yu are too strong, yu gort me out of yor world just like that. i cant be any stronger.

saw yu smiling and laughing happily from afar. yu pass by. yu saw me. the smile on yor face fades away. & my heart broke. its being pierced by 1000 daggers. rly hurts.

hope that yu rly score well for this common test, since this burden is gone.
me? i just have to listen to how all the others out there telling me "i passed my emaths..." "i gort a2 for my emaths". look at my marks and cry, once again.

thanks anyang, for today. yu are the only one who can see my tears when im actually zi-highing? yu can actually sense somethg was wrong thru my sms and came down to simei str8. when the rest say im like a, mad woman?

7-11, and it all ended. yet yu are nort out of my world.
i know yu wont be here to read anyway.

2008-03-03T18:10:00.002+08:00

i SHOULD be studying now. but whads the point. book opened in front of me, nothing goes into my head. its filled with a lot of other things, which i cant erase, no matter how hard i try.

i hate home + i hate school. this totally suck. cux i don dare to go home, i don dare to attend skul. theres like nowhere else for me to run to.
evrything is like so tiring for me now. the end of the world or somethg. wanna thank a lot of pple, but nort really in the mood to do so now. these pple were like my drugs, let me forget my sorrows at times, before i wake up to face reality.
studying is so much harder now, screwd up evrythg, i dnoe why i dnoe how. i just did it w/out the help of a screwdriver, how great.

LOLs. i tried to tell myself im strong, when i now realise i ain't. i realise i have been running away from reality. those things left untouched in my room.
i miss the past, or maybe nort. cause i might lose evrythg once again.
mummy?

2008-02-19T22:16:00.008+08:00

when i tell myself im happy, and others im happy.
i will repeat - im happy. so, believe me.

4LOYALTY makes me high. i love 4LY.

our february babies celebratn(: monday recess!

birthday cake:D:D:D

singing of birthday song

cut the cake into 42 pieces!

and its gone!

meet loyalty!

yayyyyy. so total defence, pple eat things from IPP kit, we eat party food. super cool right. we should have won the IPP box thingy lor, cux we got a cake!:D

&&&evryday there will be new and different jokes to keep me laughing, and i will zi-high in class wahahhahahaaaaa. so, who says that something = evrything?

but, i cant lie to myself. and wait in, vain

2008-02-19T20:37:00.003+08:00

its time to laugh at myself for being stupid.
its time to admire how strong other pple can get.
its time to slap myself to have mock at the strong pple.
its time to bend my heads down & learn from them.
its time to end evrythg.

spa is coming oh shucks.

2008-02-17T18:11:00.002+08:00

im amazed by evrything. i hope i could just give evrythg up. w/out anythg that could hold me back + forget evrythg in the past.
has it ever occured to yu that i might give up too? or maybe, it is just another burden to yu. im trying very very hard, no matter how much i wish to give up. im just a person who loves to put on a false front? i enjoy it? i hate it alot. how much have i used up to do evrythg? maybe one day i will be as SIAN as yu to give up evrythg.
i hate the feeling of fear inside me, to worry bout, the next one might be a bad one again, then think of ways to resolve. and endings are always disappointment. now i know whad yu have been thru, cant yu just put yorself into my shoes once again? whad exactly do yu want from me?
hate,... ... ...

2008-02-11T20:48:00.000+08:00

RAWR. tmr onwards have to stay back till very late everyday. but i somehow felt that quite worth it, if we really study( :

all leaders are supposed to step down during April. but, NPCC is exempted. im damn angry bout this laa. yu can see how we were treated as slaves by the following convo with ms wan.

me: ms wan, we POP in april right?
ms wan: no laa, july, or else who is going to do the jobs?
me: let officers take for 2 months laa.
ms wan: how can, they gort major exams like A level ley.
me: oh... so our 'O' level nort as impt?
ms wan *loss for words*

so damn cool right. and she gave the awkward face. i mean, our studies, she can just don care cux of one NPCC, which is a waste of time. so others out there score 9A1s and NPCC sobbing at aside woth 9B3s. oh so cool right? see how NPCC is going to ruin yor life right? so to all out there don ever join.

eating sushi with jiaying is, spastic. haha. we like idiots like that. turn here and there with that conveyer belt. and guess whad? we spend only around $6 per person. so cool. ate damn full larh! then walk here and there, with that jiaying's sexy voice. damn funny. she talk like singing like that, then out of tune, still continue talking, then worse. somemore laugh oso out of tune de.
so funny.

mr lim damn nice laa. i approach him for powerpoint slides, then he upload str8 away. where on earth do yu find such a good teacher? teaches well, and always think of ways to benefit us. DAMN NICE:D thanks mr lim:D

AH MENG LEFT) : rawrT.T

2008-02-02T21:29:00.000+08:00

im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy.
im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy.
im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy.
im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy.
im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy. im happy.

im happy yesterday, today and evryday( : so happy.

2008-01-29T16:46:00.000+08:00

escape. pick up. myself.
so long as everyone thinks im happy
who knows, one day, i will be happy, w/out putting on this false front.

emath eng ss egeog. better off dead.

2008-01-28T20:10:00.000+08:00

no amt of calculatn can arrive at that answer of how much tolerance, energy, time, life, tears i have wasted, and maybe many more. those ice cubes in hp are more than enuf for me. i hope for the better, &better &better, but only to realise that disappointment paid me visits. yu don give a damn. sometimes, how i hope someone could have took over.
asking, the one which yu forbid me to. yu definitely have no idea how impt tt is to me. i wonder how far endurance can bring me to. raising yor voice at me instead.
but i can guess yor answer and know the outcome.

2008-01-27T20:30:00.000+08:00

yesterday was fun. for cc team, guys were great. they improved a lot 9+mins + cutting of twine( :
girls too! 11+ mins + cutting of twine( :

basketball is fun.
it will become a routine for us! hehhh. super fun. train stamina oso:D:D:D
and thrash hewei in ABC. they all very pro, esp detian, junyi sir, ruijing. jennifer very cute. HUIYING IS THE TOP SCORER. hahahhaha.

at night went dinner with huiying. hahhs. romantic seh? =.=

today went shopping with my mum& i spammed 600+ SGD of her money. theres nothing to be proud of i know. hehsxD

2008-01-25T21:54:00.000+08:00

omg. i rly hate to repeat this again, but... ... ... i rly rly hate np now) :
i mean, in terms of the amt of time i have spent on np, and how unreasonable officers can get. "yu have one whole team behind yu" 1stly, evryone has their jobs to do, evryone has gort a whole team behind them? ohwow. 2ndly, no one in this "team" wanted to lend a helping hand. nort like i nvr ask. in fact, numerous numerous times, but whad i get is bullshit from them=.= if i were to be like them, officers, 1 lesser slave for yor okay.
i only like one officer, jiamin ma'am, hehhs. she is super duper nice!
whadevr the case is, just treasure yor cadet's life.

class totally rawks, i mean 4LY. hahhhhhh! maybe,
more hatred for np = love 4LY moreeeeee. and its rly alot alot

how i hope, evryone rly do very very well in 'O' this year:D jiayou!

today we gort our chinese drama presentation, i think my grp's skit very cool laa. pple use words to express, we use sound effects to indicate the person die. heh. stood there and just "bee-borh-bee-borh----deeeeee----" :D

how come noble gases are so lonely?
because their friends AR-GON (are-gone)
mrs kee is cute( :

2008-01-24T23:26:00.000+08:00

good or bad? it hurts me to see them like that, one who looks so strong, yet i dnoe whad is deep down inside her heart. sometimes, i felt that her heart is brittle, breaking with that slight touch, yet trying to put on a false front, just to make pple around her feel better.
why is it the opposite of what i want? the one i hate has gotten it, the ones who well deserved it didnt. so whads the point? ) :

anyway, thanks yurong, katie and t.xinyi! esp yurong!:D:D:D

today's english lesson was, bullshit. (anyway, im worryg bout my english o results, for having such a teacher.) she is talking bout crap, for 30minutes bout integrity. and she force pple to say they learn somethg. like, so lame.

PE was captains ball again! hehh. more fun this time round. cux,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, erm. shan't elaborate. too much details lur. 4LY rawks, and definitely beats NP. the match betwn emilene and mr teo was great. we are all cheering for them, especially there was one part where the ball nearly rolled into the lake, mr teo chased after it. super hilarious can!

) : english hw, nort done. nort done. i think i gonna donate $1 tmr, a step nearer to the big feast and great shopping. so, is it a good or a bad thing?

2008-01-22T20:41:00.000+08:00

yawnsssss. im tired) : very very tired ) :

tests evry single day. worst of all, all screwd up. badly. chem tmr. wtshyt.

homework stacking up high, untouched, but there is improvement! im starting to do them:D
cux came up with this new policy with jiaying, which ensures us big feasts and shopping after 'O' this year. hahhhhhs. it serves as a motivatn as well.

lessons were fun(?) for physics bah. mr chua damn funny larh. and i love this dnoe whad chapter=X math mr faizal rawks as well. he don teach, he crapped. but fun! hehh,heh. mrs kee, very cute.

o chinese results this thursday. pray hard.

2008-01-18T21:33:00.000+08:00

today is so, zzz zzz. RAWR.

pc was the worst job ever, especially when yu are informed last minute. i hate %&*$&#%!#, donknow. anyway, yor are always right. yu think i enjoy being yor slave? yu think i enjoy it or think that its an honour whenever i get to choose testers and plan for evry test. im nort. i hate it. just because i still have that 1% of responsibility, i continued. don distinguish that teeny weeny one percent too. i hate yor.

okok. happy happy!
lesson today pass very very fast i dnoe whyyy. PE is uber fun! captains ball is fun laa. 4LY rawks. amazed by that cooperatn betwn us, the dustbin which help us:D captain ball with 4LY beats NP de okay(!) BLEAHHHH.
egeog mr soon damn funny. tok bout how pple con plants and how silly mushrooms are conned. i bet yu don understand, but i do( : hehhhs.

2008-01-17T22:33:00.000+08:00

whads wrong?

okay, my frens, thankyu( : im surprised by how yu keep telling me im so scary during lessons when im nort speaking up. im surprised by how yu manage to know things hidden inside deep of me. im surprised by the way yu manage to hear the abnormal side of me when im putting a false front. im suprised by yor sensitivity, to hang up and contact me again right after that, choosing the best mode of communication. and many many more.
conclusion? interpret yorself :\

school life seemd so terrible, especially when yu cant understand yor teacher(except chinese, english and math) + fail,fail,fail x23158462times ) :

the worst commitment ever tmr again. moreover a pc. whads the pledge pple?
i think yu wont be coming on saturday, so great! ( : we only want lamyarn ma'am and junyi sir:D

2008-01-15T19:49:00.001+08:00

if only everything could be so simple in the world.
if only i could turn a blind eye, or both.
if only putting down is as easy as picking up.
if only fate is not fooling around with me.
if only things could turn out that way.

maybe, i will be happy.

2008-01-13T20:41:00.001+08:00

hahaha. suddenly felt nort that boring so came to blog.

ruiling a bit siao lur laa. she is so lame. talked to her on msn. she is.... haizzzzz.

ruiling: i go eat.
me: okay(:
ruiling(one minute later) : eat hao lur.
me: wah. so fast.
ruiling: yaa. cux i decided nort to eat. wahahaha
me: LOL. eat wind.
ruiling: no wonder i keep on fang pi.
me: erm. actually burping is the faster way out.

haha. this is nort the real funny part too. the real one, im nort gonna post it, its kinda.... erm. =.=

physics test tmr, 3 chapters, have yet to study. HAHA.

2008-01-13T15:47:00.000+08:00

sunday, so boring.

it costs around a mil 6 years. LOL. if need be still need 4 more years, by then shud be 1.5mil lur. definitely nort mesos.

2008-01-12T21:17:00.000+08:00

so today campcraft rawks? ermmm, only towards de back( :

nothing much actually, but motivatns by junyi sir and lam yarn ma'am definitely works! they rawk larh. the noise level evrythg is improving, for the girls team. guys team, improving, but nort within time. 10:06! girls are just that great:D
debrief was funny cux del acted like a zombie and paste the sprite paper on his forehead=.=

so after that went lucky bread, stay for super long. damn funny larh, pillow fight, hewei nose bleed, then floor gort blood. huiying went to clean, she looked like those murderer, then cleaning the scene.
and del is so..... OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. it disgust all of us okay.
interpret them yorself ( :

2008-01-09T19:17:00.000+08:00

felt so drowsy and tired these days, with the flu and feverish temperature yesterday.
and today, im okay(!) except for occassional sneezing. miracle.

ms kwek gives a lot of homework and had absolutely high hopes on us okay=.=
sec4year2 life is torturous and i need a breather) :

i dislike the way im now.

2008-01-08T19:58:00.000+08:00

happy belated new year.
see that belated in case yu think my reaction time is in action.

start of skul is definitely nort a pleasure. MOST teachers suck to the core indeed.
i miss tracey chua's english lesson, james lim's physics lesson, kelvin chia's chem lesson.
tts all i think cux i don miss old chang kee.

anyway, a funny conversation betwn my cadet and me.
i received an anonymous sms.

anonymous: erm, can i know my grouping for the total defence(silver)?
me: erm, may i know who yu are? haha.
anonymous: yor squad de... anyway tell me my group, cux i need the info urgently.
me: =.= how am i supposed to tell yu yor group when i don even know who yu are?
anonymous: ohya hor. fine. benedict.=.=

i laughed for the whole of recess and lesson time:D

and ohyaa, campcraft is improving( : 10:54 guuuuuys have to buck up(!) =X

2007-12-27T21:56:00.000+08:00

tmr 9am is whad yu call the gathering, but who out there is going? i have gort the so called valid reason - work, which is so gonna end late( : but who cares since we are all happy
its going to strike 10 pretty soon on my clock, so, off to tv(!)

and 816927083 cheerx! i gort jiaying addicted to why why love( :

shoo.

2007-12-23T22:18:00.000+08:00

~SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN~
grant me my wish shlep me a big sack of bounties, then.

finally one shopping with my sis today. gee. and for the next 2 days too! at IMM, entertainment centre(maybe) and jurong point, all in the faraway west huh.
not forgetg, tmr's xmas party and i have yet to claim my xmas present!:D
current status of my wallet is deflated/vacant/hollow, destitute of cash cux all had been evacuated out) :

okay now, let me overlook the fact that school is starting, next week(?), and my hw still in shipshape(at least) and immaculate, which is not supposed to be a compliment.
RAWR. and the last 100bucks in 4 more days 26-29, only) :
p.s but at least huiying is coming back!( :

2007-12-15T23:24:00.000+08:00

LOL. till now, im still unclear, why am i being pumped.
for going to work? having a job? LOL, tok to my daddy and mummy then!
for going late? sry then, i know whad i should do lur, don go back.
for nort informing yor that i will be going late? supposedly for this, i guess.
LOLs. but, weird. ALL OF US rmbrd that, on 30th november, the day we had campcraft test, the day we were chosen for the competition, yu askd hu couldnt make it on saturdays, we raised hands!!.
yu specially asked these 2 dates: 8th and 15th, i rmbrd CLEARLY, or rather, ALL OF US rmbrd, the 3 of us raised hands. weird, huh? we from different dimensions? on 30th nov, the person who asked us is nort, YOU?! OMG, i met a ghost. gosh.

please laa. yu wna scold us, show us VALID reasons. yor haven been applying whad yor thought us, nvr leave yor cadets there, unattended. HOHO.
who left us unattended today? so, we playd games, ice breaker game, murderer and the "mo qi" game, because we wna bond this team.
LOL. and yaa, think bout it, which ice breaker game is nort a game? =.= i guess its yors. yor life must be terrible, cux yor ice breaker game is sitting at a corner and being timed for tying a lashing within one minute. LOL. but its such a miracle yu can bond with pple like that, great job man! i can nvr bond with my teamates like that. haiz) :
so, yes. yu trying to tell us that we shud leave cadets there as well, then expect them to have the initiative to do things, so we just sit behind and look. haha. if tts the case, schools wun have teachers lur lo. yu think so highly of us man, thanks hor:D:D:D so glad yu thot so highly of us. but so sorry, we failed yu. SOBB.

and, yu are contradictg yorself. teamwork, yes. and yu don let us pump as a sqd. listening to yor own sqdmate pump is teamwork, lols. i didnt know man!

then now, for this.

*******: the 3 girls, why were yor late?
jiaying: we gort work commitment.
*******: FANTASTIC!

heehee. this word is so heartening! cux my mum praise me for going work as well, and tell yu a secret, i just gort my salary today. heehee. MUMMY, praise me again, pleaseeee?

and next, yu said "whads the point of rushing down at 4.30pm........."
pause here. i have to pity yor teachers here lur. kindergarten one? or i think even primary. cux, yu seemd to return yor knowledge of how to read a clock or watch, or to simplify it, TIME. haha. we reached at 3.30pm, for goodness sake. get the facts right okay? if yu rly dnoe how to read time, please, don assume the time laa. wrong assumption somemore=.= nvr correct yu on the spot is give yu face okay? no need to thank us though( :
and by saying that sentence, yu criticised my mum! RAWR yu monster. because, i ASSUME that yu are trying to say that we don need to go down mah, but then, my mum gave birth to me, who is so stupid, to go down and being accused by yu, being pumped by yu T.T

then yu say, we nvr inform yor for being late. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH. Laugh Out Loud. we did inform. now that yu know yu gort short term memory, next time rmbr to inform us about yor "short term memory disease" so that we can inform yu again that we nort coming lor=.=
anyway. we oso informed out captains beforehand okay. and delvis also explained to yu today lur. then yu pumped us. erm, for whad ah?

having a job? erm, cant be whad. thats my right. im doing the right thing.
going late? erm, have a job, go late. reasonable whad. if yu see me there, have to pray lur lo=.= and, please, we gort this job before we were in campcraft team, whad yu expect? so for this, we were right again.
nvr inform yu for going late? we did whad! so we are right!( :
the only wrong thing i have done is, why bother to go down after working? or even, why stay in this team?

and one thing delvis is right! haha. yor must scold us then we happy, cux after that, we rly very happy. the 6 of us know why:D:D:D

and, this is my blog. my opinion. my thinking. don have to try and reason with me and say my thinking is wrong. cux my thinking wun change. just read and scram. yu don even have to reflect, cux i know, up till now, 99% yu still thinking yu are right( :

2007-12-03T20:12:00.000+08:00

misunderstandg, i guess(?)
but im guilty, terribly guilty. seriously, i dnoe tt was the criteria for campcraft competitn, i thot it was just a casual suggestion from ma'am, so i used tt as a qn, since its much easier than the qn i set.who knows? LOL. perhaps i should have changed the qn to somethg else instead? i was shocked too, when ma'am announced it, and i knew it the same time as yor. sorry.

campcraft test was rather a failure? LOL. i thot the post of a sqdtaking pulld me down, i still have testg head to pull me up, but it made me dropped further. but i needa thank some pple, who rly rly are great testers, who rly impressed me by the way they take a test.
thanks, huiying for helping me control the flagstaff section and survival cooking section.
thanks, ruiling for accompanying me the whole morning, charge walkie talkies, and control the situatn at knots and hitches section.
thanks, sijia for playing walkie talkie with me when we were right beside each other, and marking damn strict at the tent section.
thanks, jiaying for controlling the lashings section.
thanks, xiaohui for marking so strict! at least i can fail pple larh! heeheee.
thanks, hewei for agreeing to take the compass section all alone! haha! and oso, keep sharing the scores with me and saying how well our cadets fare huh?
thanks, detian for being such a great tester at the hurricane lamp section with yor hilarious tone of speaking.
thanks, delvis for doing all those damn stupid yet funny actions at the flagstaff and hurricane lamp section.
thanks, shirong and gerald for the damn funny package A, B, C ideas. which made cadets spend a lot of marks buying them huh?
thanks, tanjin for mis-using the walkie talkie and make me laugh.
thanks, jinxue for being a good tester, very serious at work indeed larh!
thanks, bryan for making me exercise by asking me to deliver water to yu now and then.
thanks, sec2s, yor done me proud. more lollipops for yor!:D
i haven thank all, haha. lazy. but rly a big thank you to all the NCOs present.

and my sqd is becoming a sqd of 19) :
i will miss leefang lo. a cadet who always shows her enthusiasm. hope yu like the "small party" larh. and meet up in maple one day okay? hee.hee.

2007-11-25T14:23:00.000+08:00

its them who makes me move on in the past, but for now...

im such a failure, they were passd on to me in a good condition, still as innocent, no hatred towards **. now i seemd to ruin evrythg, by doing evrythg i think is right. but it doesnt seemd so in their eyes.
if given a choice, i will proceed with the decision i feel like making on 30th june. at least, they will still be seemd as those with poential and be able to excel, given their enthusiasm. they are still able to do much better than us, i guess. no stress on them, they might be able to move further.

fear seemd to be eating into me, taking over the feeling of looking forward to meetg them and teaching them new things evry week, nort at all afraid that they might disappoint me, because i know they wont. up till now, im the one who disappoint them, make np seemd to lifeless to them. this fear seemd to be telling me, that im the one who caused evrythg, who shudnt even get them, who are too good for me. i don even know how to be a good leader, despite 1/2 year of training. i rather nort have anythg from the start, if their interest can come back to them.

im sorry, sec ones.

2007-11-16T19:34:00.000+08:00

i am bored, and i rmbred i owe katie this. geeee,

"According to the rules of the theme: People who are tagged should write a blog post of 7 weird things about them as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose 7 people to be tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave a comment that says 'You are tagged' in their comments and tell them to read your blog."
and since my cadets named me weirdo, ohwells.

1) i need to hug onto somethg at all times, be it a book or cushion, or i will feel weird&uneasy.
2) i can feel very sad for no reason ) :
3) i love studyg but hate exams (?)
4) i love sunflowers a lot! but i dnoe why =.="
5) i like to keep myself busy. hahs.
6) i can sleep anywhr (trained by my uncle, i guess, opppppsss)
7) i cant live without music, hmphhhh.
oh&, im so weird.

sabo ruiling, huiying, jiaying, zhenwei, shirong, delvis, hewei.
teeheeeeee:D

playground again just now, gettg lousy at it larh! so giddy+dizzy): waiting for rain to fall but... ) :
and their efficiency is rather high today bah? hee. but ... ... ) :